Tag: dress

The Shining Inspired Latex Dress

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The Shining Latex Dress
This shiny and tight latex dress was inspired by those twins from The Shining. You know, from that scene where the kid is all riding his big wheel through the hotel and he suddenly sees the scary twin ghosts just standing there. Then the murder scenes start flashing before his eyes. “Come play with us Danny!” That’s some scary shizz.

I have never been able to ride my big wheel since. Mostly cuz I’m adult and got too fat. And since I don’t have the confidence to approach women when not on my big wheel, well, I’m forever alone. Thanks Stanley Kubrick!

Latex Tentacle Dress

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

etsy tentacle dress
If you have a thing for tentacles, feast your eyes on this Latex Tentacle Dress. Eh! Tentacles are for suckers! See what I did there? *It’s not really a joke if you have to explain it* Shut up or I’ll have Madame Octopus shoot you full of ink. *I had an inkling you might say that* Stop it, you’re stealing my thunder. The meds were supposed to silence you.

What’s Kraken m’lady? You look like a James Bond Villain in that dress. I’d like to be…under the sea…In an Octopuses garden…With you. Maybe have a picnic, eat an Octo-pie together. Heh Heh. Octopi. Hey just because you have eight arms doesn’t mean you get every slice! Back off sucker-arms!

Checkers Board Game Dress

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checkers dress costume
This Checkers Dress is pretty awesome. I’m a wiz at checkers. Jump, jump, jump, jump, king me baby! How about we play Connect Four instead? Do you have that dress? No? The problem with a Connect Four dress is that all of the pieces usually fall out of the bottom while you’re out doing your stuff.

The problem with this dress? I see no problems. If I win you take the dress off. If you win, I take my dress off. Cool?

Pro tip: If you have this dress, don’t get rid of it, otherwise you’ll have a checkered past.

I won! Where? There, diagonally! Very sneaky sis!

Last Supper Clothing: Surprisingly Doesn’t Cost 30 Pieces Of Silver

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

last supper skirt and shirt
Dining with Jesus? Wear this Last Super Skirt and Dress! Hey Jesus. What up? Should be a good meal. Did you order yet? I hear the fries are awesome here. What? Nah, it’s just a dress. Doesn’t mean anything. Chill dude. How about turning my water into wine here?*gulp* Gotta be honest. Tastes more like vinegar.

Well it’s been a slice. Gotta go. Hey let me take care of the bill. No, it’s my pleasure. Passes some silver to the guy behind me.
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Drunk Dressing: Beer Bottle Cap Dress

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

bottlecap dress
Hey baby! You look great in that Bottle Cap Dress. You must have drank a ton of Bud Light and Coors and been tipsy on that sewing machine. So glad we met through that beercrafting dating service. You like my cowboy hat? Nah, we don’t stand out. Do you think we stand out?

I am totally getting some tonight. You know how I know? Psst! *Whispers* I brought a bottle opener.

This beer bottle cap dress is like a suit of drunken armor that you can wear to your next crazy party.