Tag: gothic

These Bat Shower Towels Are Bat-Tastic

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Bat Shower Towels
I don’t know about you, but I feel kinda batty when I get out of the shower. So I’m gonna dry off with these cool Bat Shower Towels. That way I can lay off the bats that usually flap their wings and hold the towel for me when I come out of the shower. They were getting uppity anyway. I heard squeaks that they were forming a union and looking for actual pay in the form of food. Also, there will be a lot less bat-s*it all over my bathroom floor. Also less visits to the doctor for rabies shots. It’s a good call.

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Black Bat Gemstone Pendant

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Black Bat Gemstone Pendant
This Black Bat Gemstone Pendant looks pretty awesome. Give it as a gift to someone you are batty about. It is so classy and so batty that I’m squealing like a bat. Really I am, you just can’t hear me. You also can’t smell that fresh load of guano I just unleashed cuz I was so excited and couldn’t contain my bat-bowels. No worries, I promise to re-enact the whole thing when this blog goes VR and smell-o-vision, which will probably be about 2025. Wooo-hooo! I have at least that long to go without deodorant before anyone notices. Hey, why do all the house plants keep dying? Just one of life’s mysteries I guess.

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Gothic Spider Web Pencil Skirt For Black Widows

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Gothic Spider Web Pencil Skirt
You’re looking good in that Gothic Spider Web Pencil Skirt girl, but you know what it’s missing? Me. Along came a spider and sat down beside her. *Sits down next to you* What do ya say you and I roll around in that web and make a little cocoon? You’re not a Black Widow are ya? Not gonna bite my head off after? How about I bite your head off before and do the world a favor? Fair enough. I like that girl in the Spider Web Cardigan better anyway. Laterz.

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Cute Tiny Raven Skull Leather Journal

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Tiny Raven Skull Leather Journal
Awwww. Wook at the cute wittle Tiny Raven Skull Leather Journal. You can take this out in the field and write about your adventures. For me that would be peeing in the woods. That’s about all the adventure I can take. Looking at nature, then peeing in it as God intended. It’s how the flowers grow. Your welcome. I’m like a beneficial fairie just flitting through the woods, creating life. Sometimes pooping. When nature calls, I answer. Glad to help out. Pro tip: Never wipe with leaves of three. If it has leaves of three, let it be. Trust my rashy bunghole on that one.

Gothic Skeleton Wearing A Corset Christmas Tree

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Gothic Skeleton Wearing A Corset Christmas TreeThis Gothic Skeleton Wearing A Corset Christmas Tree is *Ru Paul voice* FABULOUS! All I know is Santa better hike that dress up real high and stack the presents tall.

Christmas morning…

*Reaches under the tree to get my presents. Skeleton slaps me for lifting up her dress!* Just trying to get my presents. Damn. That hurts!