Well that’s the final nail in the coffin! This Coffin Nail Antique Iron Necklace is pretty cool ciz if you ever come across a coffin that has been dug up and left there, you can be all like, nope! I don’t think you. Then hammer your nail in so no dead bodies can get away. Runaway dead bodies are the worst. I think they really nailed it with this necklace. I really do.
And please, just buy this one. Don’t steal one from a coffin. Remember, keep dead bodies in their place.
Meet Spike The Nail Head. A fun sculpture that you can decorate your house with. You know what his dad said when he was born? “Nailed it!” Boy did he ever. He’s cousins with Pinhead, but they had a falling out. You should see their other cousin, Staplehead. They all claim they are Hellraisers, but the only thing they’ve raised is a bunch of heck and kids with various objects in their heads.
Garbage Pail Kids Nail Decals. Pretty cool. I have some names I just thought up. Manny Cure. Cutey Cull. Fungus Cyde. Heh. I got a million of ’em. But only ten nails. It’s like my daddy used to say, “You can’t build a house with only ten nails, but you can scratch your neighbor’s wife’s back and lay a good foundation.” I miss daddy. So wise. So horny. For the neighbor’s wife.
Anywho, now you can adopt some of these dumpster rugrats and put ’em right on your fingernails. Awesome. Another day, another blog post. Nailed it.
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Oh baby that feels so good when you drag your nails across my back. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-OOOOOOOOOOOOCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHHHH. Why do you always have to draw blood? I buy you expensive bling-bling and this is how you repay me? *slash to the face* What the hell woman?
That’s pretty much how I see things going down if you buy these Rhinestone Claw Nail Rings. Women. Can’t live with ’em, can’t avoid their razor sharp claws. Now women everywhere will be unleashing their fury on men who have wronged them and others who are just in the way:
Hello Lady Wolverine. Do you have reservations? I’ll just see if we- *lightning quick slash* I’ll just fall to my knees and hit the floor, while blood spurts out my neck.