These Mold Paintings from ShannonLeeArtist are paintings of mold. They go with your crown molding. The downside for me is that if I hung these on the wall, I wouldn’t even know the difference. Where does the wall end and the painting begin? No idea. The super was supposed to get some people in here to clean the place up, but as I learned on move-in day, he ain’t super. Not even cool or just okay. He just likes to count his money and laugh a lot.
Anywho this one is a painting of moldy applesauce. I own the original in my fridge.
Some guys get f**ked by aliens and just use some hemorrhoid cream and try to forget about it. Others feel lonely and hug their pillow for like a year. Not this guy. 72-year-old painter David Huggins paints paintings about it. He lost his virginity at seventeen to an “alien hybrid” named Crescent, and sired “over fifty hybrid-alien children”. Sounds legit. At least he doesn’t have to pay child intergalactic support. Should have used an intergalactic prophylactic.
He was walking through a forest in Georgia towards a lake. He saw her sitting next to a tree. Crescent had a perfectly normal human appearance except for her head—her pale, pointed face had large black eyes and she was wearing a wig. They both disrobed and he soon lost his virginity.
Sounds like an epic love story. Thanks to Crescent the space-milf, now David is the subject of an upcoming documentary called Love and Saucers, which you can check out below. Personally, I would have called it I love Uranus, Uranus love me, but I wasn’t consulted. Read more “This Guy Lost His Virginity To Aliens, Now He Paints About It”
Are you a food beast? When you tear through a bag of cheetos, do you turn into a monster? Me too. We should hang out some time and go all beastly on some junk food. These Awesome Food Beast Art Prints show our inner monsters when it comes to food and drink. The seller CindyAndersonArtist has several of them to choose from and I’m pretty sure they are all based on me. Especially that Cheetos guy. Looks just like me, except my hands go all orange and sometimes i make lines of the dust on the bottom of the bag and take a toot or two. Read more “Awesome Food Beast Art Prints – Inner Food Demons”
These Cameo Creeps are Mini Monster Paintings that you can collect like Pokemon. They are inspired by Elizabethan paintings. They’re mini monstery mayhem just waiting to be displayed in your home. They just completed a successful kickstarter so you can preorder ’em from their website and get your creep on.
This Mr And Mrs Frankenstein Knife Set is purely for decorative purposes, but it should read “In case of marital monster fight break glass”. That way Mr. and Mrs. monster can fight to the death. It probably turns them on. Monsters are weird like that.
