Call this nightmare monstrosity anything you want. I think we can all agree that it’s ugly. A face only a mother could love? This guy’s mother left him on the church doorstep. Then burned the church down. Dude is so ugly, he went to a haunted house and came out with an application. He is so ugly, when he sits in the sand, cats try to bury him. Damn this dude is ugly. Fugly even. But if you like ugly and disgusting, this iPhone 7 case is for you. I gotta look away, so later peeps.
Tag: strange
Skeleton Light Switch Cover Plate
I like to see skeletons every time I flip the switch. So I guess it’s good that I’m the local electric chair executioner. I kid. I kid. I like to see them on my light switch cover. Even if this Skeleton Light Switch Cover Plate does make me scream every time I turn the lights on. It shows a skeleton from the front and from the back. And may I just say that you have a nice pelvis. Hey, does your gluteus maximus turn into a gluteus minimus when you are all bones? I’m gonna say yes.
Super Terrifying Cat Candle Holder
This cat candle holder is scary as hell, with the glowing eyes, crazy attitude and Mr. T gold chain. Oh and the bat wings. It’s nom nom time and fluffy isn’t f**king around! The only string this cat wants to play with is your intestines. Probably looks crazy as hell with a candle in him. It will probably scare any mice you have away for good.
Tombstone and Open Grave Ring
I love this Tombstone and Open Grave Ring from VonErickson, who also made these cool zombie graduation rings. The problem is, ever since I started wearing it, that open grave keeps filling up with corpses. I fall asleep and wake up to find a dead cockroach inside. I swat a fly on my arm and it lands right in the open grave. That’s all cool, but the tombstone gets new writing every time. When I killed that fly it read “Buzzkill”. When the cockroach was in there, it had the bug’s name along with a birth and death date and “Father of two million”. Crazy.
This Coffin Cutting Board Is Perfect For A Last Meal
How ironic would it be to cut yourself while using this Coffin Cutting Board and bleed out, therefore going directly to a real coffin? That’s ironic. Don’t ya think? Ittttt’s likeee raiiinnnnnn on yourrrr weddding day…… Sorry about that. Had a touch of Alanis Morissette syndrome. More like Adonis Morissette, cuz I’m so effing handsome! The ladies know what I’m talking about.
Also ironic if you get salmonella on this board and you die. I wonder how he’s doing. I haven’t seen Sal Monella in ages! Dude makes me laugh. Absolutely kills me every time.