Brass Hellcat Necklace

Brass Hellcat NecklaceThis Brass Hellcat Necklace is gonna raise all kinds of hell. It’s gonna scratch your furniture up, knock your drink off the table, sneak some catnip and get all fuzzed up, then lay down for 5 hours and start again. Wait, that’s my cat. No, this necklace is just an awesome piece of jewelry that looks ferocious and badass. Here kitty kitty. Stop biting me. Are you getting drunk on my blood again? Bad kitty! Sorry. Again, that was my cat.

Meowzers that is one cool cat. I’d scratch it’s belly if it had one, which is probably a good thing cuz it would just kick at me with it’s paws and rip my hand to shreds. This necklace is so good it will make you catatonic. Which would be a catas-trophy. Which isn’t the good kind of trophy.

Cool Skull Backpack

Cool Skull Backpack
This Skull Backpack is pretty sweet. I wouldn’t wear it to school though. You know why? You’ll get school-iosis. Get it? That’s a bone disease caused by too much school. What I like about this backpack is that you can tell it to zip it’s lip and it will. Zip it Skull! If you don’t zip it, I will! This thing looks badass. If the world ever goes Mad Max, I’m sporting a mohawk and wearing this thing and driving a crazy car while screaming gibberish. It’s a dream of mine.

Ouija Board Panties

Ouija Board Panties
So you and the wife are wearing your Ouija Board Panties and getting ready to “summon some spirits” when your kid bursts through the door. Mommy, daddy, what are you doing? Well, you see son. When a man loves a woman very much, he eases his planchette across her board, until you hit just the right spot. That would be when your mother yells YES YES YES. Now get out of here and if you hear stuff banging around, it’s just some paranormal activity. Lock the door on your way out. Now where were we? Still in the mood babe? No? What do you mean GOODBYE? God Dammit!

Bronze and Silver Bird Skull Necklaces

Bronze and Silver Bird Skull Necklaces
These Bronze and Silver Bird Skull Necklaces are caw-ing your name ladies. See what I did there. That’s just some wordplay to get things started, cuz I know how you like it. I’m not some savage who just whips out his bird (necklace) first thing. But forget all that. Throw caw-tion to the wind and accessorize with these awesome skulls, with sapphire, ruby, topaz, amethyst and peridot stones. Caws you deserve it. I promise you won’t cry fowl. The price? A poultry sum. I’m not gonna crow about it anymore. Even though they are worth raven about.

Glass Octopus Pendants

Glass Octopus Pendants
Hey Octopus! Your ass is grass and I’m the lawn mower. Wait, is that how the saying goes. More like, your ass is glass and I’m the Glassblower. Haha. Burn! Wait, that really sounds wrong. Anyway, these Glass Octopus Pendants are awesome. What’s Kraken? Hopefully not these guys! They can’t take a hit, cuz I heard they have a glass jaw. I wonder where they’re from. Glass-gow? Enough dumb-(gl)ass Octopus jokes. These glass octopus pendants from EmergentGlassworks are going to look great on you. Especially if you are wearing an ocean themed shirt. You ladies are gonna rock-to-pus this octopus.
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