Dia De Los Muertos Sugar Skull Bride And Groom

Dia De Los Muertos Sugar Skull Bride And Groom
Oh yeah? Dia De Los Muertos to you too buddy! This Dia De Los Muertos Sugar Skull Bride And Groom are all ready to walk down the aisle and get married. Cuz Marriage is the real Day of the Dead. Am I right guys? Is my wife here? Thank God. These no longer single skulls have rhinestones, paper flowers and a hand made top hat.

You may now kiss the bride. *Shoves their skulls together and watches in horror as they break and turn to dust* Uh,sorry about that folks. I guess it was not meant to be. That’s how you know it’s unholy matrimony.

Porcupine Lamp

Porcupine Lamp
The Porcupine Lamp always stays on, cuz I reached up into the shade once to turn it off and I needed like 400 stitches. My electric bill is like 2 grand a month, but it’s much safer this way. If you do cut yourself, at least that curved horn under the shade will channel your blood all in one place for easy clean up though. There’s that. That’s a selling point right there. Oh poopy. The bulb just blew. Time to get my chain mail long sleeved shirt and gloves. Screw it. I’m just gonna get the paper towels and band-aids right now.

Set of 4 Mothman Cups

Set Of 4 Mothman Cups
Now you can have a Mothman sighting every time you take a drink. This Set of 4 Mothman Cups gets the party started and fulfills the Mothman prophecies: Getting drunk AF while drinking from a monster cup.

The Mothman is a cryptid that was originally spotted in West Virginia, but you will see him everyday. He’s part man, part moth, all motha’f’er! A total badass. He’s got the wings to be your wingman. And when he scores you the chicks, he’s flying into a distant light like the majestic bast*rd that he is.
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Real Working Uncle Fester Lamp

Real Working Uncle Fester Lamp
This Real Working Uncle Fester Lamp is not just some dude that had a light bulb shoved in his word-hole cuz he wouldn’t shut up. It’s a real lamp based on the scene in The Addams Family. Now he can light up your room and your life. I think he needs sleep. Those bags under his eyes don’t look good. This thing is pretty creepy all lit up in the dark. I think it needs a lampshade that is a muzzle. That would be even scarier.

Life Size Poseable Skeleton

Life Size Poseable Skeleton
This Life Size Poseable Skeleton has locking joints so you can pose them anyway you want. You know what that means, right neighbors? That’s right, my skeletons are lewd and crude and full of attitude. And not to be misconstrued. You live next to me and you’re screwed. And now I ran out of rhyming words. But basically I’m saying that I’m posing ’em all nasty like. Deal with it. You have blinds.