I don’t know if this guy is a Leprechaun, an elf, or some undead freak of nature, but I’m confident that he earned the “creep the f**k out of everyone” badge and probably ate his scout leader too. Probably mixed the guy’s body with that can of baked beans I gave those little sh*ts last week when they hung a bag on my door (With several more on my lawn) and expected me to fill it with stuff I hate. Mission accomplished on that one. I gave them 2 cans of SPAM and a half case of Chef Boy’Ardee. Enjoy the GMOs troop unknown number with creepy looking scout leader.
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Tag: bizarre
Be Fashionably Fecal With The Turd Brooch
Did you poop today? Me either. I’ve been told I need more roughage than what is traditionally in a Hot Pocket sauteed in Kraft Macaroni and Cheese. But when I do poop next, I am totally going to match that poo with one of these awesome turd brooches and wear that Cleveland Steamer with pride.
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Creepy Cyborg Barbie With Arm Whipping Action
Barbie is a role model for anorexic girls everywhere. The doll has probably done young girls more harm than a million Miley Cyrus’ twerking ever could. That’s why it would be awesome if the Borg assimilated her. Resistance is futile b*tch. Go ahead and run into your Malibu beach house. They will find you and you will become part of the collective.
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Holy Jesus Reese’s Pieces
You know him, you love him. He goes by the name Jeebus, Jesus, Son of God, the almighty, the Nemesis from Nazareth and many more. He has turned water into wine, busted up gambling establishments, got sold out for 30 pieces of silver, died for your sins, then scanned his own image on his blankey when woke and moved a great big rock, saying tada I’m resurrected. Aren’t I fabulous? How much has changed while I slept? I see sandals are still in fashion. Judas, you scamp. I’m going to have a stern word for you. I am going to pinch you so hard!
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This Handbag Takes Things Literally, Is also Handmade
It’s a handbag. It’s handmade. It’s also very handy. No wonder it is full of hands. Brightly colored hands with paint on them. As if this handbag had rolled over a hundred children who were finger-painting pretty flowers and consumed them for all eternity in this bag.
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