Tag: craft fail

Mutant Dinosaur Poops Out Mickey Mouse

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

dinosaur pooping mickey mouseWTF? Just what you want to get your kid. A plush mutant dinosaur all cobbled together from various animals. Oh and did I mention that it is pooping Mickey Mouse from it’s blowhole? Hey, it also has cave drawings on it’s skin. Otherwise known as a Jurassic Tattoo.

I know how this guy feels. Reminds me of the time I gorged myself at Disney World. After a half hour of sitting on the porcelain throne, I did a Mickey myself. A huge Mickey. Had some peanut ears and everything. Then I overdid it again that night and did a Minnie, followed by a Donald. Then a Huey, Duey and Louie. I could have held it in, but I ain’t no Scrooge McDuck.

See more of this monstrosity below.
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My Cat Wants This: Crazy Insane Giant Rubber Band Ball

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

giant rubber ballI just caught my cat pawing at my keyboard and shopping on Ebay. You’d think that I would learn to lock my computer after the $2,000 Fancy Feast incident of 2009, but nope. Now she’s eyeing this huge ass ball of rubber bands for $2,999.00, so she can bat it around the house and set up a trap to make me run like Indiana Jones outrunning the giant boulder.
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Elvis’ Internal Organs Have Left The Building

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Elvis Aloha My InsidesI thought there were only two versions of Elvis. Fat Elvis and Thin Elvis. Here is a third. This painting shows Elvis with his insides showing. Hey, I think I see some half digested peanut butter and banana sandwiches. And a butt-load of pills. No wonder he sang Love Me Tender. He didn’t want people jabbing him in his internal organs while he made sweet love. Be gentle with Elvis baby. You dig?

Thanks for the tip William. Your a hunk a hunk of burning love. And you should really get that checked by a doctor.

Collecting Dust: $1,500 Worth

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jar of dustJust when we thought we’ve seen it all, we find that someone came up with the bizarre idea to collect a jar of disgusting filth and put it up on Ebay. Basically they just vacuumed their home and emptied the canister into a jar. They have probably been proudly displaying it on their shelf, next to a jar of old scabs and one with toenail clippings.
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