Small Bone Mirror With Bird Skulls

Small Bone Mirror
Everyone looks great in a mirror that’s decorated with bones and bird skulls. I mean you look better than the skulls around your face. This Bone Mirror With Bird Skulls goes well with the coffin mirror. A mirror with bird skulls is really something to crow about. I just dove it, don’t you? Everyone is raven about it.

Hey internet boy shut up.

No you shut up. This is a free country and this is a free cafe. Well, not free. I paid for my coffee, so I’m free to blog here all I want and talk out loud while I’m typing.

And I’m free to give you a wedgie just like I did last week.

*Sigh* Yes Biff. I’m leaving now. But not because I’m scared. Not just because I’m scared, but because I can’t afford another pair of undies this week.

Preserved Rat Skeleton In Wooden Coffin

Preserved Rat Skeleton In Wooden Coffin
Damn. That is one fancy funeral for a dead rat. This Preserved Rat Skeleton In Wooden Coffin makes a nice and morbid decoration. You know what his ghost said when it realized it was dead? Oh rats!

Sssshhhhhhhh!

Sorry. Gotta be respectful of all the other mourners here to pay their respects. Everybody’s leaving cubes of cheese in the casket. Man, the undertaker must have been drunk. I’ve seen better preserved Twinkies after they’ve been left outside for a month.

4 Headed Dark Duckling

4 Headed Dark Duckling
The quack is back. No, that’s not right. The quack is black. Beware the 4 Headed Dark Duckling. He probably spent his life walking in circles. That would suck having to eat for 4.

This thing is whacked yo! No, it’s quacked yo! It’s actually 4 individual ducks all put together. So this thing is stacked yo! You might say the maker got all his or her ducks in a row. And that’s all the duck comedy I have for today.

Duck Tales…Wooo-ooo!

Joker Mouse

Joker Mouse
Why so serious? Because I didn’t like XM? I don’t know, maybe because there’s a friggin’ Joker Mouse threatening me with a knife? Any other questions? No I have never danced with the devil in the pale moonlight. I have a question. Where do you get Joker cards small enough for a mouse?

Wait there for a sec. I just wanna get my toy Batmobile and my Batman and Robin figures. Then run you over. *Vroom Vroom. CRUNCH* Now ask me why I’m so serious! ASK ME!
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Taxidermy Fly On A Stick

taxidermy fly on a stick
Hey, why not? A Taxidermy fly. As if you don’t have enough of them bothering you at picnics and when people leave the door open. GET OFF MY SANDWICH YOU FILTHY FREAK!

This weird fly on a stick comes in a little glass dome. Now you won’t spread your filthy diseases everywhere! You say you would love to be a fly on the wall. Now you can be. Just put a tiny spy mic in this thing and you are a fly on the wall.
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