
Does your fridge have gross ears? It will now, thanks to this Gross Ear Magnet. Is that a zit? Or some other disease? I wanna pop it so it squirts everytime I open the fridge. I’m talking one of those long distance squirts that gets all over the bathroom mirror. Maybe I’ll talk into it before I open the fridge. “You better have two slices of pizza and some fried chicken in there or I will box your ears!”
Tag: etsy
Crazy Larva Mutant

Damn son! You ugly! Real nice. Real mature giving me the finger x6. You are the craziest Larva Mutant I’ve ever seen. What’s up with the area between your stubby arms? It looks like your abdomen is smiling. Twice! And are those three sets of bellybutton pairs? Looks like you have an ugly alien head too. That’s what I thought. Oh well. Nice getting to know you. Now it is time to kill you with fire! No stop squirming. It’s disgusting. It’s all icky and nasty.
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Gothic Halloween Coaster Set Featuring Dracula and The Wolfman

This Gothic Halloween Coaster Set is pretty cool. They will protect your surfaces and tickle your funny bone. Your humorous to be specific. Ha. I made a funny. They feature wolfman, dracula and Van Helsing. They are perfect for Halloween.
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Mad Scientist Brain Specimen in a Jar Top Hat

I think I found my Halloween hat. This Mad Scientist Brain Specimen in a Jar Top Hat is gonna look awesome on my noggin. I’d tip my hat to you, but my brains would leak all over the place. On your suit, in your eye. HE BLINDED ME, WITH SCIENCE. Actually brain juice. Why are scientists so mad anyway? Probably cuz they don’t get enough sleep. Science is tiring. It should be called shy-ence cuz these dorks are all working alone in rooms underground and stuff.
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Beeswax Coffin Candle Set

Mind your own beeswax by displaying this macabre Beeswax Coffin Candle Set in your home or funeral parlor. Macabre. That’s a weird word. Should be said like mac-ab-bree, but people say mac-cobb. Words are weird. That’s okay, we like weird. Imma put a bunch of these on a birthday cake for a really old person and see if I get punched.