These Horror Film Knives are going to look great in your kitchen. They are for “decorative purposes only”, but I’m a rebel so I’m gonna chop my vegetables with these maybe display one sticking out of a pumpkin or something. That’s one way to scare up some dinner. Ha ha ha. I made a funny. Anywho, these are great for horror fans. I’m not only a fan, but I’ve been in the horror business for… Let’s see, how long have I been married? I kid. I kid. But seriously, these knives will make company think twice about eating at your place.
Tag: home decor
Terrifying Burnt Faced Baby Doll Head Lamp
Looks like someone has been playing in the lava. This Terrifying Burnt Faced Baby Doll Head Lamp will haunt your room and your nightmares. I bet it looks like a scary floating head when all the lights are out. I hope not cuz I don’t want it to float too close to the curtains and burn my shizz down. I’ll be seeing this in my nightmares tonight.
Coffin Coffee and Side Table -Funeral Home Decor
Have a coffin or two with your coffee. This Coffin Coffee and Side Table will make your home look like some mortician owned coffee shop. They can customize these in any color combo you want. I bet they could even put a fake body inside for those who like a full-bodied coffee. Get it? Would you like some cream-atorium with your coffee?
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Giant Stuffed Fetus Chair
What. In. The. F*ck! So I saw this today. Can’t unsee it either. I tried washing my eyes out with bleach too. Then I couldn’t stop thinking about it, so I poured bleach in my ears, hoping to burn it from my mind. Still seeing it in my head, but now I also feel woozy. So it’s a fetus. Also a chair. Giant Stuffed Fetus Chair. A fetus of what though? I have no clue. Sit on it, sleep with it, hang out with it all day long if you want. You will have the biggest fetus around.
Fetus! It’s the new futon. He’s very scared of the vacuum for some reason.
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Sea Serpent Metal Art Bookends
See, this is why I never go in the water. There are too many things that can kill ya. Like Sea Serpents, which are worse than serpents cuz the sea. But I don’t mind having these Sea Serpent Metal Art Bookends on my shelf. Reminds me that life is dangerous. For dumbass sailors and the like. He’s just gonna eat that ship and there’s nothing you can do about it. And if you jump ship, something else is just gonna eat ya. No thanks.
Sea Serpent. Pffft! More like See serpent. Cuz when I See Serpent, I run!
Also check out these Kraken Bookends.
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