I’ve seen my share of maggots. Don’t ask. But I’ve never seen a Monster Maggot before. I’m not even sure what to say about it. Cuz only bad things rhyme with maggot. And since that’s the grade level I’m at, I’m kind of at a loss. It’s a cyclops maggot cuz it only has one eye. Those teeth look pretty sharp. The face is pretty ugly too. Which is exactly what my dentist says to me. Followed by “Shhhh. Sleepy time now.”
Tag: horror
Interior Frighting – 3D Printed Skull Lamp
At last, a lamp that makes my skull glow! Well, not my skull. What am I, radioactive? The skull/lamp skull. Alas, poor Horatio. I knew him well. I will miss him. He was always a bright guy… So bright I use his skull to read by at night. I think I might put this in my window and freak out the neighbors. And speaking of great ideas, it’s like this skull lamp is having a bright idea everytime you turn it on.
Don’t worry, no actual skulls were harmed to make this lamp. It’s 3D printed. Which I think means that they wear those blue and red glasses while they make it, so it jumps out at them and gives ’em a scare. Then they go back to work making skull lamps and the next one does the same thing. Pretty sure that’s what it means.
Yo, can I get some skull light over here? Trying to read a gripping novel over here. *Brings the light closer* I’ll be damned. I thought I was reading Shakespeare, but it was just the back of the cereal box. No wonder I didn’t understand it. I was reading Golden Grahams when I’m actually at a Trix reading comprehension level.
Read more “Interior Frighting – 3D Printed Skull Lamp”
Coffin Wine Stopper For Your Macabre Merlot
I know that all of that wine is gonna kill my liver, so my bottle might as well have a coffin top. This Coffin Wine Stopper will help your liver and your wine RIP. That’s rest in peace. Just in case anyone thought I was typing a fart sound my butt just made. That would be more like riiippppp with a tight squeak. And it just happened for reals. Man, I need some coffin underwear now, cuz that one killed my colon. Scratch that. I just need new underwear.
Alien Xenomorph Facehugger Bunny Sculpture
Sure, humans have to watch out for facehuggers, but bunnies have to be extra careful. Aliens just love hugging a bunny face. It was recently reported that we lose 4 out of 10 bunnies to face hugging. It’s a real problem as shown in this Alien Xenomorph Facehugger Bunny Sculpture.
Peter Cottontail can become Peter no-face in just an instant, so it’s important that we get the word out about this alien on bunny violence through figurines like this. We may even save some bunny faces. If I can save just one bunny face by sharing this, it will have all been worth it. Cuz bunnies rule! Aliens drool!
We have to protect their little whiskers people!
Realistic Brain Necklace
If I want to wear a Realistic Brain Necklace, does that make me a fashion zombie? I do crave it. Kinda want to bite it even. And lick it. Just put me out of my misery right now cuz I won’t be happy until I get this juicy brain accessory and wear it around my neck. Still gonna lick that thing though cuz I’m freaky like that. It looks so ooey and gooey.