What the heck is that thing? It just creeped right out of my closet and peeked at me, then went back in. I think it might have been The Babadook Horror Movie Doll.
I’m too scared to look
It must be the Babadook
Who’s responsible for that overdue book?
It must be the Babadook
The Babadook
He ain’t no crook
Can’t clean your house
Can’t even cook.
First name’s Baba
Second names Dook
I don’t care,
Cuz I’m too scared to look.
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Meet Spike The Nail Head. A fun sculpture that you can decorate your house with. You know what his dad said when he was born? “Nailed it!” Boy did he ever. He’s cousins with Pinhead, but they had a falling out. You should see their other cousin, Staplehead. They all claim they are Hellraisers, but the only thing they’ve raised is a bunch of heck and kids with various objects in their heads.
This Hellraiser Pinhead Cenobyte Pet is pretty adorable.Aside from the fact that it is basically a porcupine and you can’t pat the little beast. Also, forget having bedding and pillows without holes in them. And if this critter wants out the screen door, all it has to do is push it’s pins into it and it’s free. Good luck as it rubs up on your furniture and rips up all of your fabric. I would advise some sort of head gear that acts as a protective cage.
Check out this cool Skeleton Cutlery from Skelemental. This is just one of many super awesome and super expensive things that they sell. The place is so expensive, all I did was browse their site for like 10 minutes and my wallet was gone, but that’s probably just cuz I was browsing on my phone and didn’t notice the pick-pocket. The joke is on him, cuz one lifesavers wrapper and a never-used condom from 8th grade is not legal tender.
This cutlery is scary as hell and not just cuz it’ll cut ya. Cuz it looks like what demons keep in the kitchen, although to be fair, I have never actually seen the wife with these at dinner time.
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Hey, it’s a peeker zombie. Peek-a-boo. I see you. And by the way, you are bloody disgusting. Good thing I can’t see the rest of you. What’s the deal with like, being half stuck in my floor? What are you, some kind of fetish freak carpet sniffer? Fine by me. Just tell me one thing. I’ve always wondered, do my feet smell like decade old cheese or dumpster Fritos in the summer? EHHH WRONG! That was a trick question. I have it on good authority that they smell like decade old dumpster Fritos topped with cheese.
Whatevs. Just keep doing your thing down there. We’ll see how long you last with your nose stuck in the Frito freeway that is my never washed carpet. Ain’t no off-ramp pal.
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