Jeeper creepers, where’d ya get those peepers? Jeepers Creepers where you get those eyes? Probably from some other dude’s skull, cuz look at this guy. Don’t mess with him. This Jeepers Creepers Horror Movie Clock is pretty awesome. What time is it? Oh, it’s half past the severed head. I’m gonna be late! This clock has an axe for a pendulum that swings back and forth too.
Tag: odd
The Hour Is Nigh – Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse Unicorns
If it isn’t the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse Unicorns! Collect the whole set. Behold, four horrific unicorns: Death, Famine, Pestilence, and War. Not sure, but I think these may be knock-offs cuz I don’t see any cutie marks on their butt. Oh that’s- Nevermind. My bad. Also, I noticed you call them horsemen, but they don’t appear to be horses that look like men. They also don’t have riders. Also, they are unicorns. So what gives?
I’m gonna pit them against each other and save the world! Pestilence can kill War with a plague, Famine can kill Pestilence, Death will kill Famine and… Holy unicorn crap! There’s just no way to beat Death!
Okay, I can do this. Gotta get my head in the game. Instead Famine kills death… But wait, he’s death. How do you kill death? There must be a way to solve this riddle. Start again. Start again. Damn, changing up the order doesn’t work. It’s always death! Death! Death! *Screams, then collects myself with some deep breaths*
Oh well, looks like we are all screwed. I tried! I really tried guys! Death is just too powerful. Hey, at least none of them are named taxes. Am I right?
Scary Vampire Skull Mask
Damn. This Vampire Skull Mask is what vampires look like under their pale skin and beady little eyes? Dude must have been in bat form when he died. Sucks. Was probably drunk and flew right into a tree. Happens. Fun fact: My vampire name is Bela Lu-Gassy. For obvious reasons. Of course in high school they called me Vlad The Inhaler for completely different reasons. This is the perfect mask to wear to one of the Eyes Wide Shut Illuminati parties. Not that I ever get invited.
Sexy Velociraptor Body Hug Pillow Case
Well, hello there. You are one sexy Velociraptor. I am gonna make sweet love to you until you are dino-saur. Baby you are-
*Door opens*
What?! Nothing is happening here. Just admiring this fun Sexy Velociraptor Body Hug Pillow Case. What do you mean my hips were gyrating? It’s called dancing.
Dirty Dancing?
Very funny.
So you weren’t giving her a Jurassic Pork?
You are disgusting. She’s not like that.
So you weren’t giving her a big hard bang that would lead to the extinction of her species?
GET OUT! JUST GET OUT! YOU RUIN EVERYTHING!
Screech Owl Skull Necklace
Give a hoot, wear a Screech Owl Skull Necklace. I knew you would like it, cuz we’re birds of a feather. Can I get a “who who”? Can I get a “hoot hoot”? I say who, you say who. Together we say who who! This bird skull necklace is owl ta this world!
Seriously, these bird skulls are gonna look good with that outfit you have on.
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