What poultry offering do I have for you this time? How about a Dancing Chicken Lamp? Does it do the hustle? The Charleston? The Elaine from Seinfeld? I have no idea.
All I know is that this chicken has paid it’s Per-Dues and is ready to dance the night away. So crank up the volume and play some funky nuggets and some free range beats. This lamp is feather-pluckin’ insane son!
Why does this “watch frog” have it’s eye on me? You spying on me?
Just a lil-ribbit.
Okay cool. You didn’t see nothing right? Just a guy relaxing on a weeknight, watching some Netflix with a rubber chicken nearby. Anyway, watch that eye. You don’t wanna get frog-glaucoma. Hey, here’s a good one.
Why couldn’t the 1/8 Polish guy join the Polish military?
Cuz he was only a tad Pole. Hahahaha.
Nothing to say about that? Frog in your throat? I kid. I kid. Seriously though, stop watching me.*Pulls shade down and grabs rubber chicken.*
I don’t even know what to say about this condom wrapped Durex mummy. Yeah I do. It looks like a Trojan factory worker took someone hostage and just used what they had handy to tie him up. Let’s see what the seller says. The seller’s words are in italics. My responses are bold.
“Trappings I” is a piece that demands inquiry.
Yeah, like why the f did you do it? Also, any other hobbies we should know about? Last inquiry: Do your hands smell like lube?
It arrests the attention of anyone looking at it.
Yeah, my attention is all handcuffed and beat with a baton. Can’t even make out your badge number through my black eye. Still swear I smell lube. Is that thing gonna stink worse or less as it sits on the mantel?
Not only due to the stark contrast of the actual materials used, but once one begins to question why they were used, a real debate can open up. This piece speaks to social issues that are raging even now. The interpretation is of course up to the viewer, but there were real issues I wanted to bring up with this piece.
We already know why you used the materials you used. It’s better they don’t go to waste. At least they were used for something. The only debate is whether you have any left over for future projects. Depends what kind of a deal you got on an economy pack. As far as issues the artist wanted to bring to this piece, oh yeah, you brought ’em! This piece is full of issues.
Read more “Condom Porcelain Doll Sculpture: That Rascal Is Wrapped”
Run for the border with this Realistic Handmade Taco Purse. It is great for holding your taco money. Obviously. It looks delicious.
I’ll just have two tacos to go.
But you already have one sir. Can I get you anything else?
No, see, this taco is not a taco. I need a real taco. Two of them.
Looks pretty real to me sir. Would you like anything to drink?
JUST GIVE ME @&%$**$# TACO! IS IT TOO MUCH TO ASK THAT MY BOWELS BE ON FIRE THIS EVENING?
This Star Trek menstrual pad is ready and waiting. You decide Captain Kirk’s destiny. Will you make him the first Captain in Starfleet history to go from a gold shirt to a red shirt?
Kirk to Spock. I know we are supposed to go where no man has gone before, but I’m pretty sure other’s have been here. Personal log…It’s also…*hand gesture* very…dark…and wet. I want to beam out, but is she green? If she’s green, I’ll stay. Is that wrong? Spock? Hello?