Harry Potter Monster Book Of Monsters Replica

harry potter monster book
When you read at a third grade level as I do, even the Harry Potter books are monster books. I got to about the third paragraph then took off the dust jacket and put it around my iPad so I could read the movie instead. Much easier. Until my ADD kicked in and then I had to play the Harry Potter video game, which didn’t last long because, hey a cat that needs petting!

Long story short, I have no idea what this Harry Potter Monster Book Of Monsters Replica is all about. I think it rewards reading by biting your face off or something. You see why I avoid books and words and stuff? The only reason I can type halfway coherently for you guys is because I have the mailman proofread and edit. I just grab him everyday when he hits my mailbox. In return I complete his route for him twice a week. If you can call delivering mail to the dumpster behind the convenience store completing a route. Hey, it is junk mail. Duh! And I have no idea where those Netflix DVDs went, but those shiny coasters all over the house have nothing to do with it.

3D Printed Replica Of Your Unborn Fetus

3D printed baby
Ahhh, isn’t that cute? No. Fetuses look weird and freakish. It might be cute if it was cosplaying as a Pokemon or something. Or if it appeared to me in a dream with a little mustache and goatee, telling me I have to save the world. But no. Not cute.

This place will sell you a 3D Printed Replica Of Your Unborn Fetus so you can show it to your kid 20 years from now and watch him or her wig out when he realizes he was basically a tadpole with limbs.

P.S. Just called my mom and asked her to buy one. She sent them a pic of my freakish sonogram. After that nothing. So I called them back today and their operation sucks over there. Bad timing on our part. Seems like they have a little suicide/madness problem in house. Plus I could hear crying and shrieking in the background, along with, “I can’t create that! Don’t make me look again! It doesn’t exist. It SHOULDN’T exist!” Click.

Wow. Wonder what their problem is! I haven’t encountered anything like that since the guy who actually did the sonogram had a look at the unborn fetus and went nuts. He immediately completed the Japanese ritual of seppuku in the hospital room and prayed for “humanity’s protection from such foul beasts”. Anywho, check out this weird fetus art.
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These LEGO Fast Food Buildings Are Making Me Hungry

fast food lego buildings
Etsy seller ABSDistributors makes all kinds of cool custom LEGO toys, but the best are these fast food buildings, so your minifigs can go in and eat, get all fat like Americans do. Hey, I’m not knocking it. I’m an American and I’m stuffing my face as I write this, even if it is hard to see the letters on my keyboard thanks to a thick dusting of Cheeto particulate.

They have replica interiors and everything. Once you put your minifigs inside that McDonalds, it will be so realistic that you’ll be complaining about how the kid behind the counter is a dumbass and why is it taking a half hour for one Big Mac and an order of fries anyway? Look, can I speak to your manager? I can’t play with these things. I’m getting way too stressed just thinking about it. WTF! I didn’t order a Sprite! My whole day is ruined now. Why is it so hard to get the order right?

That’s it! I’m dismantling the whole damn thing and putting up an Arbys.
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Joker And Henchmen Clown Mask Set

joker henchmen clown mask
“Why so serious?” Oh, I don’t know. Maybe because you waltzed in here and just robbed my bank wearing freaky clown masks. Look, I’ve only been bank manager for less than a week. You think you could rob somebody else so I don’t lose my job? I’ll even give you a sweet low interest loan Mr. Joker. A great mortgage rate? You know what? F**k it. I’m gonna get a mask just like every other freak in Gotham and I’m gonna start robbing people. The Batman can’t catch us all right?

These limited edition Joker gang masks based on The Dark Knight movie are no joke. In fact, they look pretty scary. (Fun story. I accidentally typed “Joker bang masks” and I saw images of naked people in my head. Wearing these clown faces. All piled on each other and gyrating.) These $766. masks are form fitting and will transform you into one of the Clown Prince of Crime’s many henchmen. You should be fine as long as you don’t, you know, wear them to your bank, or while boarding a plane and whatnot. Check out Joker mouse over here for a good laugh at the clown prince of crime.
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Walking Dead Daryl Dixon Zombie Ear Necklace

dixon ear necklace
We’ve featured netherworldoddities work before and now we are really getting an ear-full with this Walking Dead Daryl Dixon Zombie Ear Necklace. You can see a bunch of her other scary stuff in the background. Daryl sure likes to collect ears. Maybe he’s making an ear-wax candle. That would explain it. Maybe he’s just eerie! This fun piece of jewelry reminds me of The Who’s rock opera “Zombie”.

Zombie can you ear me?
Can you feel me near you?

That’s “Tommy” you idiot!

No it’s not! Oh wait! You’re right. I really should clean this record and finally make the jump to that new CD technology. It’s not even vinyl, it’s so dusty it’s more like felt. I didn’t even notice after the needle grew a Gandolf beard that it likes to drag around the grooves. Also, the song “Foosball Wizard” never did sound right. You live you learn.