Tag: strange

White Walker Jesus – Game Of Thorns?

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White Walker Jesus - Game Of Thorns
Sing it with me Billy Idol. “It’s a… nice day for a… White Walker.” Remember that time in Game of Thorns(Get it?) when that dude killed that white walker and three days later it resurrected. That’s how you get Easter in Westeros people. This White Walker Jesus will let you relive all of the excitement. Choose your house: Stark, Baratheon, Lannister or Christ!

House Christ rules! I hope I’m scoring some good points to get into heaven here. You da man Jesus! Sorry about all that stuff I did and continue to do, but it’s cool cuz you forgive everything, so I just keep doing that stuff and that’s why we’re tight! Can I get a high five and an amen? Still ignoring me huh? That’s cool. We tight. We tight.

Cthulhu Bottle Opener

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Cthulhu Bottle Opener
Yo Cthulhu, lend me a tentacle with my beer. Cuz the only thing worse than an elder horror is the horror of being without a cold beer. This Cthulhu Bottle Opener will let you pop those bottle caps with the power of the tentacled one himself. Bring me the head of Cthulhu! For I must drink! Cuz H.P. Lovecraft stands for Heineken Pabst Lovecraft. True story. I think. I may have just made that up in a drunken stupor.

Hey, that reminds me of a joke. What do you call an alcoholic apartment manager? The Stupor-intendent. Ha ha ha. Drunk humor is the best. Thanks for all the Cthulhu Mr. Hangover Prone Lovecraft. Laterz.

Funko Mopeez Classic Horror Plushies

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Funko Mopeez Classic Horror Plushies
Feeling mopey? Yeah, me too.It’s cuz I don’t have any of these Funko Mopeez Classic Horror Plushies. I knew I was missing something in my life. It was a bunch of cuddly horror movie killers. You know what else is a horror movie killer? Diarrhea! Well, it’s a movie killer in general. Too many milk duds and a river of coke in my stomach. That’s why I always bring a change of pants to the theater. Lifehacks people!

Retro Nightmare On Elm Street Lunch Box

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Nightmare On Elm Street Lunch Box
Pack a lunch cuz you are hanging out with Freddy Krueger today. This Nightmare On Elm Street Lunch Box will not only hold your lunch, but it will make ya lose your lunch too when Freddy comes to life and crawls outta this thing, cuz you are dreaming and probably very dead soon.

All I know is Freddy best not take my ham sammich! Damnit! He did! He took my ham sammich! It’s on now Freddy! It’s onnnnn like Donkey Kong! You shoulda traded me for it Freddy! Now you die!

Spider Skeleton Key Necklace

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Spider Skeleton Key Necklace
You ladies are going to look amazing wearing this Spider Skeleton Key Necklace. I wonder what it unlocks. Probably some treasure being protected by a giant spider queen. Nah. You know what it unlocks? My heart. Nah, not really. It unlocks a world of fashion and style cuz this necklace goes with anything girl. You gonna look sharp wearing the key to the spider kingdom. Sorry, I just gave away what it unlocks.