Tag: ufo

Canadian UFO Event Depicted on New Coins

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Canadian UFO Event Depicted on New Coins
Sometimes UFOs abduct people and they take a poop sample. Why? No idea. Probably just another damn fetish. Their ships probably smell like ass. Let that sink in. Intergalactic ships just cruising through the galaxy smelling like ass. No air freshener in sight. Anywho, the Royal Canadian Mint has unveiled a new coin that celebrates a legendary UFO encounter in Manitoba. Way to go Canadians. You are celebrating some dude’s rectal exam.

The incident is known as the ‘Falcon Lake UFO event’ and it occurred in 1967 when Stefan Michalak spotted a pair of flying saucers while he was searching for precious metals and gems. Turns out the aliens were searching for precious metals and gems too. In his heinie-hole. I’m just guessing that’s what happened, cuz it always does.

So Canada is celebrating this on a new coin. I don’t have the heart to tell them that coins are typically round.

via CBC

Cosmo Sock Alien Plush

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Cosmo Sock Alien Plush
Awww. Look how cute the Cosmo Sock Alien Plush is. So adorable. Look at those hearts on their bodies. Hearts mean love. So when they forage around your fecal fortress with their special probes, they’re just loving on you. Hmmm. I guess that applies to some humans too. Don’t be fooled by these cute plushies. Aliens are dangerous! Never forget! I don’t even wear clean underwear anymore or wipe myself, cuz if they come for me, they’re gonna find a nasty surprise! Surprise alien mofos! Either clean me up or toss me back! Preferably both.

3D Printed Grey Aliens From Roswell In Many Colors

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3D Printed Grey Aliens From Roswell
Time to collect some 3D Printed Grey Aliens From Roswell. I can pose these guys by their downed UFO and put some army men around them. Relive that history that the government is trying to hide from us. Then I’ll wake up and discover I have missing time, and I’ll forget ever buying and playing with them. I love all of the colors cuz each color is a different rank of alien. The grey ones are the low guys on the totem pole. They have to do all the butt-stuff.

Weird Alien Hardwood Gemstone Pendant

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Alien Hardwood Gemstone Pendant
This Alien Hardwood Gemstone Pendant is based on Sacred Geometry, whatever that means. I’m TLTG. Too lazy to google. Not sure if it’s supposed to keep aliens away or what, but I’m not falling for it. I’m pretty sure this is nothing more than a human tracker. If I wear this, the aliens are going to know where I am at all times and probably know exactly when my butt is dilated enough for their probing.