Here’s a good reason to never live in Australia. A couple in Australia had an unexpected guest at their home: a massive Huntsman spider. Presumably called that because they hunt men. This thing was the size of a dinner plate and appeared on a glass patio door. So basically you need a fly swatter the size of a car tire to kill it. And if you miss it will just hug your face and impregnate you.
They never did kill it so it is probably in the couple’s garden still, waiting to strangle their cat. Hell no! Never going to Australia.
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Tag: wtf
Praying Mantises Are Killing Birds Worldwide And Eating Their Brains
So basically Praying Mantises have been biding their time and now that the end is nigh, they are going full zombie and eating the brains of birds all over the world. Seems legit. They no doubt plan on eating bird brains until they absorb all of their flying powers and then we will have a new species that can poop on our heads. Great.
More like Preying Mantises. Am I right? Look at that pic. Dude is just munching on that bird brain as it hangs there. That would be like me hanging out a second story window with my teeth gripping a cow by the head, instead of just having a burger. It’s just showboating, which is why Mantises and me will never get along. Showoff zombie vermin!
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Creepy and Just Wrong Political Swimsuits
Remember that Sexy Chest Swimsuit? Ewwww la la! Well, check out these Creepy Political Swimsuits from Beloved shirts. They got Trump for your bumps, Famous alleged muderess and liar Hillary Clinton, Bernie Sanders and Vlad the Impaler. I mean Putin. You are gonna look so sexy sporting these at the beach. Why get one when you can get them all and go to the beach as that weird group who does that sort of thing. Look what Trump’s chin does to your lady bits!
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That Exists – Weird Catnip Cat Toy Fetus
Yep, that exists. A Cat Toy Fetus. Great precedent to set. Now cats are going to want to play with fetuses all the time. They’ll be attacking pregnant women just to get at the cat toy they are carrying inside. Great idea. They are gonna give upon mice in favor of their new favorite toy. The fetus. Meh. Whatevs. I guess. At this point I just have a de-fetus attitude.
Also get this fetus for your wall.
Mega Macabre Monstrous Mutated Mutation
What the shizz! I don’t know if this Monstrous Mutated Mutation is some dude who ate too much at the McDonald’s in Chernobyl, or a mutated peen and sack that had too much viagra from the Fukushima pharmaceutical factory. I’m guessing the latter. If it starts growing suddenly or vomits a stream of pee, I guess we’ll know. I can’t unsee it and now neither can you. It ain’t no tardigrade.
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