Fine Disease Art: Goiter and Pox On You

Goiter and Pox
Gemmamae made these illustrations that represent various diseases for a book she is working on. There will be 14 images all together. Are we sure that goiter isn’t an adams apple? I think the artist is just a goiter-exploiter. Probably makes ex-goit-tation films about it. And why do they call it smallpox? That shizz is big. It’s all over him. That’s bigpox. It’s like the herp gone wild.
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Raven Skull Belt Buckle

Raven Skull Belt Buckle
This Raven Skull Belt Buckle has a one word comment to make about your sex life as it hangs over your junk ominously and pecks at your soul: Nevermore!

Wow! That skull just burned you good. Hey, I didn’t say it, the bird skull did.

It’s a pecker that holds up your pants. Everybody’s “raven” about it.
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Zombie and Ugly Face Mugs

Zombie and Ugly Face Mugs
MakingFacesPottery not only makes weird faces while making pottery, they also occasionally make fugly face mugs, like I did in grade school. Their’s are much better. These Zombie and Ugly Face Mugs have faces that only a mother can love. A mother hopped up on acid, who sticks her head in the oven after getting a good look at the kid! The shop has freaky creatures, zombies, fugly things that defy naming and other monstrosity mugs that will scare the black off your coffee and make the sugar jump from your tea.

*Random audience reaction.* That’s not politically correct! You should be nicer!

*Looks at dude’s avatar.* You should be on a mug. Burn! That’s why ya don’t mess with me. You ugly. You ugly. Yo mama says you ugly!

I don’t have an avatar!

Hmmm. Um. The burn is on me then. That was actually my reflection. U-G-L-Y, I’m the one with no alibi. You have won this round sir! But ugly never gives up, so I will be back and uglier than ever. Right now I have to see someone about marketing a mug in my image. Actually I think that second image really captures my twisted and freakish essence. Almost.
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Horror Movie Killers Poster

Horror Movie Killers Poster
Psycho Killer… Qu’est-ce que c’est… What do we have here? That there is a Horror Movie Killers Poster, that’s what. It is full of killers, psychos and murderers. You have never seen such a hive of scum and villainy as this poster. It’s like a serial killer class reunion and you know what that means. It means that they started killing each other as soon as this picture was taken. Not sure who survived, but my money is on the shark.
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Brain In A Jar Soap

Brain In A Jar Soap
Hmmmm. Now where did I put that brain? I might know if I hadn’t misplaced it. But I did so… Me dumb now. Oh there’s my Brain In A Jar Soap. There’s nothing like lathering up with gray matter. What these soaps lack in firing synapses, they make up for in firing suds-napses. I like cleaning with brains, makes me feel smart. Like I am absorbing the knowledge from the brain and adding it to my own database. And believe me, I need all the brainpower I can get.

I’m like a showering zombie. *Approaches the shower muttering, “Brains… Brains* OW! Bumped into the tub and fell in. See, this is why I need brains.
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