Category: Creep Wear

Hashtag Costume #Costume

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hash tag costume
The hash is a smash! You’ve used it on social media. You have abused it. Now you can be one with the hashtag. Or, you know, just use it to play tic-tac-toe on yourself.

Hey, it beats skin tags. It also beats a rashtag. It’s the all around super smash tag. Wear it with the wrong colors and it’s a clash tag. Share it, wear it, get on social media and declare it!

Disclaimer: I’m really not that excited about this costume, which is basically four strips of fabric, but I had like 4 lattes and a bag of oreos so even Dr. Phil felt awesome today. I kept swearing it was up for an Emmy until I sugar crashed and woke up to The View. I screamed and passed out again.

This Wolf Motorcycle Helmet is Hairy And Scary

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wolf helmet
Hey there Little Red Riding Hood. You’re everything a big bad wolf could want. Why don’t you hop on my motorcycle and I’ll take ya to grandma’s house. You know this wolf helmet is awesome because it comes from Wolfhelmet.com. They aren’t messing around. They are all wolf helmet. All of the time.

Now when you do those sweet-ass stunts like jumping over fiery barrels, you can look awesome as your leg snaps in half. You may even be tempted to grab that hunk of meat by the bone and start gnawing on yourself. Cuz you know, Wolf helmet will transform you.

That’s how you know that you are a bad ass biker dude. You wipe out, you wolf down some dinner. That’s why you don’t see packs of werewolves on bikes. You wipe out, they feed, until there is only one.
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Flashing Sound Activated Equalizer Music Helmet: DJ Creepface

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Flash Sound activated helmetNothing is going to scare the hell out of a bunch of kids tripping balls faster than DJ Creepface wearing this Flashing Sound Activated Equalizer Music Helmet. This noise activated helmet flashes in time with the beat of the music. Do they even have raves anymore? Do you even rave bro?

Well, I raved about that new flavor of Doritos. Then there was that bacon wrapped Little Ceasers pizza. So yeah, I rave! Granted it’s all just trippy music and a light show as I dance around my living room and eat pizza while rubbing my belly, but that totally counts.

Eyeball Cufflinks

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eyeball cuff links
Eye love these Eyeball Cufflinks. Eye will wear them with my fancy wedding/funeral clothes, cuz the only time I dress up is when people die and men die hardest when they wed. That’s why I called my second marriage Die Hard 2: Die Harder. I’ve been a box office flop ever since.

Whoa! Hey! Hang on! Just want to be clear that doesn’t mean I can’t get it up. That’s not what flop means here.

Whatevs. These eyeball cufflinks are all blinky and stuff. Freak people out and hold your arms up all day as if you can see through their eyes. Because you can! Because that hand rolled tobacco that dude just gave you has kicked in and now you in the Matrix son! Blue pill or red pill? Pffft! I’mma mash ’em into a purple pill and be the ever lovin’ architect biatches!

Burned Freddy Krueger Skin Nikes

Artemis Winterford1 Comment

freddy krueger burned skin nike shoes
If Freddy Krueger escapes the dream world and starts chasing you, you can run away in style while wearing these Burned Freddy Krueger Skin Nikes. They feature a cool print of Freddy’s burnt skin, but not the soles of those he tormented. Heh! I made a funny.

Seriously though, these sneakers are pretty awesome. You’re gonna look like you have burnt Freddy feet. Make sure you wear them in your nightmares. Freddy is either gonna love these and have a beer with you or hate them and cut your ankles off to take them from you because they will be just his size. They look like meat, but are for your feet.
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