Category: Creep Wear

Dragon Head Flats

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Dragon Head FlatsAside from being an awesome band name, Dragon Head Flats are these cool shoes with dragons on them. Also sounds like a place with dragon skulls everywhere. “Hey man, I’ll race ya at dragon head flats!” I am so there. Sadly, these shoes don’t breath fire so you ladies are just gonna have to settle for the old fashioned “kicking us in the balls” when we misbehave, which is a lot. Cuz I’ll probably piss you off with puns like:

Hey you are really draggin’ today. Are you the mother of dragons? Cool, cuz I wanna be the dad.

Stuff like that, cuz I’m what they call an arsehole in the UK and an A-hole everywhere else. Sweet dragons though. You need like dragon print leggings to go with these. See? I offered a good tip. I’m not a complete A-hole. More like a B-Hole cuz I was never an A student, unless I was saying, “Aaaa this sucks.” which it did.

Gothic Black Bat Wings Backpack

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Gothic Black Bat Wings Backpack
I’m gonna store all of my Red Bull in this Gothic Black Bat Wings Backpack. You know why? Cuz Red Bull gives you wings! Well, sure diabetes too, but wings aint bad. Gonna strap this thing on and run real fast so those wings flap in the breeze while I squeak like a bat, even if that is just my asthma. It’s gonna be so cool. I’m a bat out of hell baby! Then I’ll jump off the roof and either fly or be a puddle of Red Bull on the sidewalk.

Melting Plastic Leggings

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Melting Plastic Leggings
These Melting Plastic Leggings are going to be all the rage this year. And all the rage will be from my mom when I ruin my new white pants by having my buddy Shane throw red wax on my crotch so it can drip down. Also I’ll be stuck in these pants forever since my man-parts will be fused with the material. Worth it though, even if I have to run around in circles trailing smoke until I find a water bin to sit in to put the fire out.

Full Moon Panties

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Full Moon Panties
Full Moon Panties? Those aren’t full moon panties. Full moon panties are no panties at all. Just your ass painted by the light of the full moon. I would have called these the Wolf of Ball Street. What? They’re for women? Are you sure? Cuz I’m pretty sure I can make that wolf tongue move and appear to lick itself. No takers?

Cthulhu High Heels

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Cthulhu High Heels
These Cthulhu High Heels show off different representations of Cthulhu all over. Your soul may just be in jeopardy. Or your soles! Hey girl! Take a walk on the wild side! Doot doot doot doot de doot… Cuz you a true horror. And I mean that in the nicest way.

Hey, didn’t I see you at Miskatonic University? No kidding. How about you and me go get a Gin and Miskatonic then go back to my place for a little Lovecraft?