Awesome Garden Gnomes Look Like Your Favorite Geek Characters

creepy garden gnomes
Etsy seller ianthegnome makes all kinds of crazy garden gnomes that look like superheroes, wrestlers, video game characters. You name it. Okay, I will. I name it awesome. Check out a bunch below and then go crazy ordering them for your yard. I call dibs on Superman and Batman cuz I’m creating my own gnome Justice League.

You can have Dexter and his cellophane wrapped victim. Gizmo too. No way I’m putting a Mogwai in my garden. You know he’s gonna get wet and multiply into a s**t ton of evil Gremlins that are going to break everything, eat everything and cause nothing but trouble. In other words, another me. One of me is plenty. I refuse to share my junk food and there’s not much left in my house that I haven’t broken already.
Read more “Awesome Garden Gnomes Look Like Your Favorite Geek Characters”

Skeleton Pocket Watch

skeleton pocket watch
Hey, what time is it? Half past this dude’s ribs and a quarter to his spine. This stylish pocket watch is all dangling skull and bones- That reminds me. I really should check in on Grandma. Old dangling skull and bones herself. The smells the neighbors reported are not good. Then again, she’s been known to have a sever flatulence problem. Usually have to bring a canary with me just to see if it’s safe to enter. It’s usually not, which is why I have no idea what she’s doing in there. I just add the dead canary and the cage to the pile in the hallway and slowly back away, while holding my breath.

Moving on. This pocket watch is all ribs. Perfect if your name is Jack the Ribber and you have no idea what time it is. That’s a terrible joke. Not even funny. Hey, excuse me! I’m worried about my grandma here.

Update: Just called her. *Blah blah blah. Can’t get up. Cats are nipping at me. Pool of my own filth etc etc.* Wait. If that was the smell, what killed the canaries? *Oh, I fell in the kitchen and I’ve had nothing but tacos for a week. squeeeeaaak-pfffft*

Damn it grandma!

Anyway. Skeleton Pocket watch. It’s friggin’ cool looking!
Read more “Skeleton Pocket Watch”

Game Of Thrones Dragon Rings And Eggs Set

dragon rings
Be the mother of dragons with this awesome Game Of Thrones Dragon Rings And Eggs Set. Just like Daenerys Targaryen, you will have these little dragons wrapped around your finger. Literally. And unlike Daenerys, you won’t have to worry about dragon poop, which is fiery and nasty and smells like goats. That will leave you with a smoking stump and an appreciation of dragon digestion for sure.

You get 3 Dragon Rings with their 3 Dragon Eggs which act as a kickass jewelry box for them. The divided halves of the eggs are linked by a hinged base which holds the dragon by his tail. Trust me these rings will get you noticed more than Hodor saying his name over and over again during an AA meeting. The whole set is $185.
Read more “Game Of Thrones Dragon Rings And Eggs Set”

These Electric Outlet Wall Art Stickers Are Shockingly Awesome

electric outlet covers
Cover those boring electrical outlets with some fun pop culture characters. Etsy seller ElectricStickerCo has everything you need. Characters like Finn and Jake from Adventure Time, Heisenberg from Breaking Bad, Doctor Who, and a bunch of monsters.

Reminds me of that time I stuck my finger in the socket and got a cool new hairdo and was catatonic for like 2 hours. Thanks for child-proofing those outlets mom. I guess it helped to make me the freak I am today.
Read more “These Electric Outlet Wall Art Stickers Are Shockingly Awesome”

Fortune Cookie Coin Purse

fortune cookie coin purse
I see a Fortune Cookie Coin Purse in your future. These Fortune Cookie Coin Purses look so real, you’ll want to eat them, but don’t. Trust me on this one. A purse full of pennies, nickels and dimes do nothing for your dental health. Yeah, I carry a purse! So what? It’s convenient. Plus, I’m the only one prepared to get revenge on all of those old ladies who take an hour to pay for their groceries with coins. I like to get ahead of them and give them a taste of their own medicine.

These fun purses even come with a printed fortune paper inside of each one. I see only one problem. *sprouts blue cookie monster fur* Me want real cookie! Give me cookie now!