Category: Just Plain Weird

Aren’t You A Little Constipated To Be A StormPooper?

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trooper on a pooper
Friend to the site and all around cool guy(He still scares me though) DeadGreedy has another fun bit of Star Wars weirdness. A StormPooper. This Funko Pop figure is reading the paper, trying to force his muscles like a trash compactor, so he can lay some Imperial mines.

I hope he cleans up real good, because everyone knows Stormtroopers can’t shoot straight. Speaking of shooting, why does he need his blaster while on the toilet?

Oh, that’s right. This is a cut scene from George Lucas’ “remastered” Star Wars. I read about this. There was that comedy bit where every time this guy sat down to do his business, he got interrupted by Leia’s rescue. As I recall, it ended with this guy cowering on the Millenium Falcon toilet, as an angry Wookie bursts in, ready to take a hefty “Steamy Ewok”.

Chalkboard Skull

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chalkboard skull
Ancient humans knew how to leave notes for each other. They would just take some ash from their fires and write on the skulls of their dearly departed. They had plenty of writing space too since everyone died at like 23 back then. Once you hit puberty you knew it was all over.

Now you can write messages on skulls too thanks to this handy Chalkboard Skull. They come in all kinds of different fancy colors and styles. Or you could just, you know, use the skull you have and write messages on your own head in sharpie. That’s what I do. Which is probably why I only remember to get eggs when I look in the mirror. Or when I’m walking down the street and people point and laugh, saying, “Hey eggs” or “It’s the egg-man!”

Pet Hoodies Make Your Pet Look Gangster

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pet hoodies
Make your pet look like the badass he/she is with Pet Hoodies. Besides, small pets can have a hard time keeping warm in the winter months. Make them look warm and tough, so that every time they stare at you wanting food, you feel like you are about to get mugged. It’s cool. I don’t want any trouble. Wet food coming right up.

And make sure you give your pet a cool gangster name to go with their new hoodie. Better yet, give them a rapper name. Like Dr. Spay or 2pac Shapurr.

3D Alien Chest Burster Poster

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alien 3d poster
In space no one can hear you scream. That’s true of the internet too, because you didn’t hear me scream like a girl a minute ago when I spotted a spider. Outside. On the other side of a closed window. Terrifying. But I’m better now.

This 3D Alien Chest Burster Poster really makes a statement. I’m gonna hang it in a hallway about so high, so that every time I pass it, I can shake it like a hand or high five it. He’ll be my little bloody buddy. What was that guy’s name who had this thing burst out of his chest? I have no idea, but his name should have been Ripley. RIPPPP. Here I am, all bloody with my neck sticking out of your chest. What’s up guys? Got any snacks?
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Custom Amigurumi Exorcist Playset

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Amigurumi Exorcist Play Set
Check out this handmade scene from the 1973 film The Exorcist. It features a crocheted Regan sitting in bed, projectile vomiting onto a stunned Father Merrin. That is some quality crochet vomit right there!

This pukey homage to the classic horror movie stands about 9″ tall. Believe it or not, I’ve never seen this movie. Obviously, it’s about a priest caring for a young and sick girl. Seems like a real feel good flick. Gonna check this one out.

Update: Holy crap guys! It’s like 3 A.M. and I can’t sleep because that movie was not a feel good movie! It was a feel like Satan is hiding in every corner and going to possess you movie. Gonna go hide under my blanket some more and cry and whimper at every creak and groan this old house makes.

Update 2: Phew. I’m so silly. Those creaks and groans weren’t the house. Just the bed struggling to hold my fat ass.
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