What the spud? So this exists. A Plush Potato. A bunch of plush potatoes. AKA your average American. Hey, I can say that cuz I’m American and all doughy and potato-like. So now you can cuddle with a plush spud. These guys look like fleshy ghosts who would multiply and haunt you forever.
Tag: bizarre
Skeleton Hands Boot Bracelets
These Skeleton Hands Boot Bracelets are all the rage this season. Don’t know why. Maybe people like the idea of skeleton hands reaching out and grabbing their ankle, to trip them. Sometimes they bite your ankle with their bone teeth and laugh. And if ya can’t kick them off you’re just dragging a skeleton down the sidewalk and bones clink and clank. Man, I hate those guys!
Makeup Artist Sticks Googly Eyes All Over Her Body
So this happened. Great googly moogly! This woman stuck googly eyes all over her face and torso. Her optometrist is gonna be very confused. My main concern is that all of those eyes are gonna strain themselves and need glasses. Or monocles. She’s gonna need to buy like 500 monocles.
Hey, you like to cover yourself with googly eyes? I don’t judge. Stick ’em on and shake yourself about. That’s what it’s all about. This and the hokey pokey. She’s like a rattlesnake shaking and rattling. You’ll put an eye out! I bet her name is Iris. If you want to learn how to do this yourself, you’ll have to learn from her and be a good pupil. Heh. Enough eye jokes.
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Bigfoot Kidnapping Gnomes Statue
When one mythical creature starts kidnapping other mythical creatures, you know things are bad, as evidenced by this Bigfoot Kidnapping Gnomes Statue. Technically it’s gnome-napping. Which is a misde-minor. Get it? Misdemeanor… Misde-minor cuz their so small. He’s probably gonna take them back to his cave or stick-hut and cook them for dinner. Maybe he just wants company too. Or slaves. Maybe he’s gonna make them build him a Bigfoot castle.
Dead or Alive T-Rex Wine Bottle Holders
These Dead or Alive T-Rex Wine Bottle Holders are cool. Display the alive T-Rex Wine bottle holder when you start your illustrious drinking career, then display the dead one when your liver is shriveled and nasty. It’s life’s precious cycle.