This Lace Bat isn’t your grandmother’s doily. Unless your grandmother is Morticia Addams. If that’s the case, let me just say that your grandma is hot dude. This lace bat is great for the table, great for an end table and works just about anywhere. It looks really nice and creepy if you haven’t dusted in about 12 years, like me. *Picks up lace bat and throws it.* Fly. Fly bat! *Chokes on cloud of dust as it lands.* I wish I knew what sets off these damn allergies!
Tag: decoration
Molten Lava Gargoyle Decoration
This Molten Lava Gargoyle is hot hot hot. It’s gonna be a hot time in the old town tonight. It’s lava-ly isn’t it? Fun fact: I accidentally typed isn tit at first. Made me giggle. This gargoyle is going to look amazing in your home,on your roof, or wherever. You can put him on your roof, no roofies required. That’s how I usually get mine up there, and it’s wrong. I’m sorry. Now I just ask nicely.
Monster Light Switch Cover Plates
*Flips switch* Ow! Cut my finger on the teeth again. Ow! Damnit! Now I probably have an infection from Monster saliva. What the hell. I didn’t need the lights on anyway. Gonna use candles from now on. Stupid Monster Light Switch Cover Plates. Plus, that puddle of drool/saliva on the floor under the light switch is probably a safety hazard. These guys still aren’t housebroken. And I’m sick of brushing their teeth once a month! That’s more than I brush my own.
If you don’t mind all that, you can choose from this one or this one.
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Skull Couch Feet
These Skull Couch Feet are like creepy sneakers for your couch. Cuz your couch’s feet get cold people. Give it some scary Nikes. People be like, Damn! Your couch come wit that?” And you’ll be all like, “Sweet ain’t it?” Your couch be all like, “I look good son! Now get me some badass armrests and a tattoo before I swallow one of you fat-asses whole!”
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Ouija Board Coffin Coasters – For Wine and Spirits
I had a bad experience once, so Ouija Boards are dead to me. Therefore I dig these Ouija Board Coffin Coasters. Well, I don’t dig them up. I just dig them. Now every time you set your drink down, you can communicate with the dead. Good luck deciphering their message though, through a bunch of foamy beer or some red wine. It makes sense you would put wine and spirits on your spirit board. Hopefully my drink doesn’t fly off when the spirits get mad.