There’s nothing like the cold dead embrace of skeleton arms around your neck. Except when your grave robbing and fall in and the skeleton hugs you like crazy while you’re just screaming and freaking out, but enough about my weekend. This Skeleton Hands and Arms Necklace is like a bony hug all day long from a skeleton that loves you. There’s no guarantee that those bony hands won’t touch your boob and cop a feel now and then, but that’s the chance you take. Just smack its hand and it will behave. Maybe.
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Tag: etsy
Golden Poop Emoji Bottle Opener
This Golden Poop Emoji Bottle Opener is the shiny golden turd that will open all of your bottles. He looks happy about it too. The poop emoji is the best. He beats all other emojis cuz poop. Poop trumps everything. You know who wins in a game of rock, paper, scissors? Poop. Poop wins every time. I dare you to find a cuter gold poop that can pop your caps off.
Phrenology Head Cufflinks
Phrenology is the study of the head. True science. You can learn a lot by looking at a head. Like if it has lice or hasn’t been washed in like 5 days. So totally true. These Phrenology Head Cufflinks honor this science and put some classic looking cue balls on your cuffs.
Go ahead, feel my head and tell me all about my metal disorders and personality traits.
*Touches my head and massages my scalp.* This spot says that you are a very creative person.
Nah, that’s just where I fell and hit my head. Although I was creatively doing Jackass stunts at the time and having my friend hit me in the nuts while going down a windy mountain road doing about 50 in a shopping cart.
This area is all about your sex life.
Is it small? Is it a tiny area? Yeah, then that’s accurate too.
See, it’s a real science. No doubt about it.
Rib Cage Chain With Skeleton Cameo
Nice ribs! I hear protective boob wear is all the rage now that Wonder Woman has a movie, but this Rib Cage Chain With Skeleton Cameo isn’t going to protect any Warrior Princesses. It does accentuate your rack pretty nicely though. I’m just ribbing ya. That was crude. Ya might say that joke was a bust. This boob-cage is like a decorative outer-wire bra. I like it. Best rack of rib I’ve seen all day and I just got back from the butcher’s shop. At least I think I went today. My mammary is not what it used to be. I prefer my boobs free range though, not all cooped up in a cage. They need to run wild, even if it’s a bit nippy outside.
Skeleton Mask With Broken Ribs Eyeholes
What the hell? So you are really wearing someone’s skeleton as a mask? It’s got the pelvis, spine, even some broken ribs for eyeholes. Now that is a badass Skeleton Mask. Please tell me you didn’t go all alien predator and rip some midget’s bones out of his Oompa Loompa body and just wear it to some Eyes Wide Shut kind of Illuminati orgy party? You didn’t right? Nevermind, I don’t want to know. But I hope you won best costume.
Anyway, I’m outta here, so bone-swa or whatever the French say.
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