Tag: etsy

Pulp Fiction Rodent Taxidermy

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Pulp Fiction Rodent TaxidermyPulp Rodents! These furry little badasses are taxidermy rodents that look like Vincent and Jules. They have tiny suits with ties and even tiny pistols. They are probably arguing about a quarter-pounder with cheese while blowing some dude’s head off.

Looks pretty good. I’m guessing the seller put clothes and little guns by mouse-holes, only to find out that those losers never want to cosplay. The joke is on them, because in death, you will be made to wear this stuff. It is just the vicious circle of life.
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Underwear Earrings: Briefs, Not Boxers

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Underwear EarringsUnderwear that’s fun to wear. For your ears. It even has that little wiener door, just like real underwear. Some guys just use the window, meaning they pull their underwear down to drain the dragon. I prefer the door, because it’s more dramatic when a dragon bursts through the door, throwing splinters everywhere and letting out a mighty roar.

Ok, ok. So mine is not so much a dragon as it is a dragonfly. Anyway, it’s not the size, it’s what you do with your wings. Am I right girls? …Girls? Any insect lovers in the audience? I do this thing where I hover, then move, and hover again.

Creepy Trash Cans

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creepy trash canYou talkin’ trash? U mad bro? I’m talkin’ trash. Etsy seller Artbytoast has some creepy/cool hand painted trash cans that will eat your garbage. They might even burp afterward. I should probably get one. This bachelor lifestyle is good and all, but I’m kinda sick of the whole “shovel by the pile of garbage in the kitchen corner.”

I mean, it isn’t that much of a hassle to open the kitchen window and shovel trash into our backyard garden like I’m powering a locomotive with coal, but I think it might be time to upgrade to an actual can for trash… Then I can just dump it all into the garden in one go. Yeah, I’m gonna spend the $40. Just as soon as I buy a few more video games.

The seller has several weird trash cans to choose from. Click through for more images.
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Cat Drinking Fountain

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cat drinking fountainGive your cat friends a neat fountain to drink from and stop making them drink from a dish. They just want to be like you and do things that humans do. This $1,250. cat fountain is all fluffy requires for his or her drinking needs.

All my cat would do with this is just bat her hands against the water a few times and then sit and look at me.

*I made you waste your money again human.*

It’s not a waste you little-. I bought it for me. Watch me drink from it. See?

*I made you drink from a cat fountain human. Your lives belong to me*

First off, I only have one life, not nine. Second-

*One puny lives for me to dominatez?*

What are you-?

*Hisssss! Enough acting brave for yourz blog. Into the room of living. I grow weary and haz need of yourz lap for nap timez.*

Looks like I have a new human fountain. Gotta go.
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Scary Superhero Nutcrackers

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nutcrackerSuperheros are all about cracking down on crime and that means cracking bad guy nuts when they have too. So superhero nutcrackers make a whole lot of sense.

These nutcrackers from Etsy seller ARTBYBART are pretty scary looking. And the all have balls for fists. I see a freaky nut/ball pattern here. Not saying this guy has peen on his mind, just saying it seems weird because I obviously have it on my mind. Let’s just leave it there. I got more issues than DC and Marvel combined. You don’t want to be flippin’ through the pages!

Click through for more, including the Joker, Wonder Woman and Optimus Prime.
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