Damn, that’s one sexy chest! Not! *Vomits for 10 minutes straight.* This Sexy Chest One Piece Swimsuit will transform you ladies into something hideous, but this is what some of us look like at the beach already. I should probably sue for copyright infringement because they totally just copied my nasty man body. These come in three skin tones and all are horrifying. That photoshop above gives you some idea. This is nastier than that Guts Swimsuit.
Tag: gag gift
Poop Buddies Forever Coffee Mugs
Are you my poop buddy? I’ll be yours if you’ll be mine. Pinky promise? Gross! Your finger has dukey on it. Anyway, these Poop Buddies Forever Coffee Mugs are perfect for you and your poop buddy. Friends. The buddy system. That’s what it’s all about. It’s all about friends helping friends poop. I think. Maybe it’s about two friends slamming their poop filled hands together to activate super powers. No idea. Maybe it’s about one guy being the lookout, while the other guy drops a Cleveland steamer by the side of the highway. If so, I’m a good friend.
The Highway patrol will never get you for doing the doggy squat while I’m on guard. They’ll get you for indecent exposure and kidnapping instead cuz I don’t know you and I’m just glad to be free and all over the local news. It was quite an ordeal. *tears*. He wanted me to drink from his Poop Buddies Forever Coffee Mug. *sobs* Wrap that rescue blanket around me. Which camera should I look into? That one? *Crying* I just want to go home now. It was horrible.
Wreck The Halls – Moose Poop Christmas Ornaments
These Moose Poop Christmas Ornaments are not just moose turds that you fling at your tree. They are highly polished pieces of poop attached to various brass and other backgrounds. I was always told that you can’t polish a turd, but I guess Etsy seller sharkman123 has found a way. I especially like the one that is a butterfly carrying a big shiny steamer as if it’s going from one butt to another, pollinating poop. You don’t see that everyday. More like Butt-erfly. Am I right? Except this kind evolves from a scat-erpiller. And that’s the straight poop!
Merry s**ts-mas everyone.
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Human Centipede Ginger Bread Man
So… That happened. The Human Centipede Ginger Bread Man wants to be your new favorite holiday decor. Looks like they have a good ginger bread train going there. All aboard! Choo choo! If you’re gonna do the whole human centipede thing, I guess being a ginger bread man is the way to go. That way, all you taste is ginger bread, instead of you know, butt. I love that guy’s face in front. He’s all like, “Holy shizz! I did not see my day going like this!”
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Alien vs Predator Pin
Oh damn!!!!! Burn! OH NO HE DIT INT! Snap! I guess he told you! The ghost of Michael Jackson is not gonna be happy about this Alien vs Predator Pin. Not one bit.