Tag: gaming

Hand Made Stone Skull Dice

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Hand Made Stone Skull Dice 2
It’s time to roll them bones with these Hand Made Stone Skull Dice. Forget rolling snake eyes. I’m rolling skull eyes from now on. You play with these dice and heads (skulls) are gonna roll. They were sculpted and cast by hand in case you were wondering. They weren’t carved from the skulls of tiny square-headed people.

Legend has it that when you play with these dice and have somebody blow on your dice for luck, you can feel their breath on your own skull. Oh wait, that’s not right. That was just that guy standing way too close behind me. Back up dude! I can smell what you ate for breakfast! Smells like bacon and pancakes and despair. Seriously, back up. Your hot stinky breath made my dice into sad skull faces.

Psycho Kitty Purse / Dice Bag

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Psycho Kitty Purse Dice Bag
That’s a bad Psycho Kitty Purse / Dice Bag. Bad kitty! No! This terror kitten is a purse or a dice bag. Your call. Just don’t complain to me when it rips your face off. Those eyes! They claw at my soul and lap it up like milk. Psycho Kitty! Qu’est-ce que c’est. Fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa. Better, run run run run away.

He’s a psycho night-meow! Whatever you do, don’t introduce him to your kitty, unless you want a kitty shaped hole in your wall from where he ran the hell away.
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Dragon Dice

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dragon dice
Dragon Dice! The game of dragons and dice! New from Spaz-bro! These dragon dice are just what a nerd like me needs to up my D and D cred with my dungeon-mates. I kind of opened a door without checking for traps. Then ran in and found myself in the center of like 50 sleeping Orcs in their barracks. Who all woke up because I yelled, “What’s up biatches!” So much for stealth.

As punishment they fireballed and lightninged the whole room, with me in it. They haven’t let me play since, even though I brought cookies last time. These dragon dice should make up for it. Then I’ll be back to getting people killed in no time.
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Space Invaders Future Fossils

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Space Invaders Future FossilsCheck out these Space Invaders Fossils from Etsy seller ThrowingChicken. I do not condone the tossing of fowl, but you know what this means right? We won! We finally killed those 8-bit suckers! Pew pew pew! Get the UFO for extra points!

Basically they all got shot down and fell into a video game graveyard during the “war of a hundred-thousand quarters” back in the 80s. Then in 2164 someone used a virtual device to go inside of these vintage game machines and dig up all of these fossils and send them back in time so they could sell them on Etsy and make a butt-load of money. Good thinking!

They aren’t so tough without their brightly colored skin stretched over their skulls. I’m getting one cause these guys owe me like 500 quarters. If I can’t have my childhood money back, I can at least have a rock solid corpse.
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Roll Them Bones: Troll Skull Dice

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troll diceTroll skulls. It’s the wacky dice game where you try to roll a pair of sixes, which is nearly impossible with these dice. Trolls can’t count that high anyway. Shake ’em up and let the dice fly. Troll your friends. Troll your family. It takes skulls, not skill.

This cool and creepy dice set is only $15.22 from Etsy seller thejessejames, who claims they are 100% genuine troll skulls.

I told the seller, “I need these like I need a few pips on each side of my head.” Cause I’m just witty like that. They liked the idea and dragged me into their workshop, but they were forced to use the catch and release method on me, because they found out my head was shaped more like a D20. A D20 with a kickstand. I have a big nose. And a big mouth. So my skull would always stop on the same number.

Awesome! Once again, my mutant nerd genes pay off.
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