I don’t have any skeletons in my closet. Except for this Skeletons in the Closet Coaster Set. That’s probably because I don’t get much company. You should always keep your skeletons in your closet. I mean, skeletons, right? People see skeletons outside of your closet and they think you’re a killer. Yeah, a killer decorator! Nobody understands my love of the creepy!
Tag: home decor
Mini Vampire Kits
These Mini Vampire Kits will come in real handy if I get attacked by a tiny blood sucker. That’s why I’m taking one of these with me in the woods. You know, ticks. Tiny bloodsuckers. Also should be good against midget politicians. And it might help you against doctors bearing tiny syringes. There are a lot of tiny blood suckers out there now that I think about it. This will help.
Necronomicon Light Switch Plate
Holy Necronomicon Batman! This Necronomicon Light Switch Plate will make me way to scared to turn the lights off. Or on. Turn ’em off and I’ll be too scared of some portal to hell opening up and swallowing me whole as Cthulhu devours my soul. Turn ’em on and that Necronomicon face will scare the bejesus out of me and I got very little bejesus left!
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Skulls And Ravens Bookends
Oh my stars and garters! (Whatever that means.) Oh my skulls and ravens. These Skulls And Ravens Bookends are creeptastic and awesome. It’s a well known fact that ravens like to perch on skulls. I can’t even walk to my car without a raven landing on my head, but then it leaves because I have too much skin and hair and stuff. It sits on a tree branch somewhere just waiting and watching. Waiting for my demise so that it can perch on my bare skull.
This is why I run to my car and never ever look up.
Succusaurus Cacteye Dinosaurs
Love these Succusaurus Cacteye Dinosaurs. I just love to say it. You suck! Yeah? Well you succusaurus! You’re a Succusaurus rex! They are a safe place for all of your succulents, but they also create a new dinosaur species. I was trying to figure out what else to say, but I can’t find the right words. Better consult my Thesucusaurus. I mean thesaurus.
It’s like dinosaurs were attacked by plants. From the inside! This is why I don’t eat salads people.
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