This The Rituals of Cthulhu Throw Blanket looks warm and cozy. You know what the sleeping rituals of Cthulhu are? Well, he likes to spoon, he likes to be spooned and gyrate his hips, sleep on his side with his knees up so he’s poking you with his knees, sometimes he curls up in the fetal position and sucks his thumb. Those are the rituals of the great tentacled one. Stay warm my friends.
Tag: novelty
Coffin Lipstick Holder
Is your foundation to die for? Does your mascara look murderous? Is your lipstick the balm? Embalmed? Then get the Coffin Lipstick Holder and let your makeup rest in peace. This is perfect for the creepy girl who has nowhere to store her many shades of black lipstick.
Remember girls, when you kiss a guy all over his face, he shouldn’t come up for air looking like a coal miner. Then again, how else is he gonna find a diamond like you? I know, I’m so sweet. Kiss away ladies. I’m available. Looks like it’s back to the coal mines for me. It’s a tough job, but somebody has to do it.
Denture Necklace
Time to have a denture adventure with this Denture Necklace. Ohhhhhhh gummy! Now when I need a top set cuz I’m trying to chomp down on a Burger King Whopper, I can just grab my necklace and shove ’em in my face. Like those librarians that have their glasses on their necklace, just more disgusting.
Nah. I would never do that. I’m just teething teasing.
Amityville, Friday the 13th, Nightmare Elm Street Horror Crossroads Sign
Let’s see. Which way do I go? I knew I should have taken that left turn at Albuquerque. This Amityville, Friday the 13th, Nightmare Elm Street Horror Crossroads Sign will guide the way. Although I don’t think you are going to like any of your destinations. I’m just turning back. Seriously, you have fun with whatever you choose. I’m gonna go take a nap or something.
Medical Anatomy and Oddities Pillow Case
This Medical Anatomy and Oddities Pillow Case is just what I need for some late night reading before sleepy-time. No wonder I have nightmares. Read me a bedtime story…
There once was a medical quack
who lived in a old wooden shack
He took out his spleen
and washed it all clean
then kissed it and put it back.
Cuz he’s weird. The end.
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