Mermaids. Those bare-breasted sirens of the sea. Those breasts are not for mortal man to see, as proven in this video. Some guy caught a mermaid sunbathing on a rock and when she notices that she’s being filmed, she freaks out and scurries off back into the sea. Mankind will have to wait another day, or perhaps a year, or a century, to see mermaid breasts, the most elusive breasts in nature.
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Tag: sea
Mermaid Skeleton Necklace Pendant
Show your love for mermaids with this cool Mermaid Skeleton Necklace Pendant. You have to show your love and respect mermaids. Mermaids are the maids of the sea, keeping Poseidon’s castle clean and washing Aquaman’s clothes. Sometimes they have to cook the Little Mermaid dinner. They even have to find Nemo when no one else can. Mermaids have a tough job. So be nice to them.
Large Octopus Brooch
I’m not afraid to brooch the subject. This Large Octopus Brooch is the bee’s knees, Cthulhu’s tentacles, Medusa’s locks, Frankenstein’s bolts. Too scared to wear it? Don’t be an octo-puss! This guy has eight arms to hold ya with baby. Plus he’s all ink splattered, like a pen exploded in his face. I hate when that happens. He was probably just writing in his diary and SPLAT, day ruined. Don’t let your day be ruined by missing your chance at a cool accessory.
Kraken Flasks
You are never drinking alone when you have a Kraken clinging to your bottle like a wino best friend saying, “Come on ya tosser. Give us a drink! I ain’t had too many no how. Give us just a lick.” These Kraken flasks from Etsy seller Elstwhen are krak-a-laka Kool.
*Glug glug glug.* Hey, why does my booze taste watered down and like Cthulhu backwash? You better lay off my hooch you big Octo-puss or I’m gonna play a little game I like to call Kraken-smackin’!
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Octopus Door Handle
I would never stop opening the door if I had this Octopus Door Handle. *Takes it’s tentacle in my hand.* How do you do Cthulhu? You’ve got a great grip son. You are really going places. Probably to the bottom of the ocean, so you can drag me down and suffocate me. It’s cool. Do what ya gotta do. I’m not letting go.
I would also make it all sticky and slimy so people who enter my home get the full Octo-experience when shaking tentacles with a beast from the depths. Octo-experience! Welcome! You’ve been slimed. Now you get to see the suckers that live here. Get it? Suckers?
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