Category: Dead Stuff

Apocalypse Ready Squirrel Taxidermy

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Apocalypse Ready Squirrel TaxidermyThis Squirrel is prepared for the apocalypse. Are you? He has his machine gun, gas mask, extra ammo belt and some ear protection for target practice. This rodent is ready for action. Mount him on your wall as a reminder that you must be prepared.

When the Zombies come and the mutant dogs and wolves run in packs, you’ll wish you had the foresight that this squirrel had. He is only $155 from Etsy seller Rickscustompottery. We can all learn alot from this little guy.
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Mummified Baby Possum With Four Arms

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

possumThe latest in horror action figures is this mummified baby possum with not two, but four arms. For $349. he has zero points of articulation, but is very imposing in an action stance. Display this guy with your superhero figures. I would suggest you pit him against Batman, so that the Caped Crusader is all like, “Damn, WTF! Gotham just got too freaky for me bro. Alfred, fuel the yacht and get some babes on board. We are leaving town. Let that pansy ward of mine protect the city for awhile. Okay, what the hell is Glee and why is he watching it?”

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Pair Of Real Raccoon Faces

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raccoon facesWant a pair of actual Raccoon faces? Seriously, these are skinned straight from their cute little bodies and thrown on Etsy for your perusal. Only $4.95. That’s a great deal if you are into freaky animal face stuff.

Put them on your golf clubs as covers, have a creepy puppet show with them. The possibilities are really endless. Get super freaky and sew them into your own face as you wield an axe and chase others through a forest. I don’t judge. I’m just here to show you the freaky-deaky.

Dead Stuff: Bizarre Monkey Taxidermy

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weird dead monkeyWhat the hell is this thing? Some weird taxidermy monkey I guess.  Maybe a baby bigfoot? Nah, if it was a baby bigfoot, the images would be all blurry and the voice in my head would have called bulls*it! But what does he know? Anyhow, this funky monkey is kinda cute. Thankfully he is no longer alive to transmit epidemic monkey viruses and such.

The seller had it listed for $395 or best offer on eBay. Sadly it sold before I could offer $2.59 in change and a lifesaver with cat hair and couch fabric embedded in it. If someone got this for 3 bucks, I’ll be mighty pissed off, because my next offer was to include the removal of said cat hair and couch fabric from the lifesaver. My calculations make this offer worth at least 3 bucks. Those watermelon lifesavers kick ass! I really gotta start upping my bids and offers.

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Dead Unicorn Rat Surrounded By Bubbles

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

rat unicornWhere Unicorns are sweet and magical and rainbow bright, and all about chasing virgins and pooping skittles, the Unicorn Rat is all about hanging on your wall and looking like an evil overlord.

His eyes will follow you wherever you go and he will shoot magical dark rays from his horn which make you do his bidding. (Things like making you dance in your underwear on a carpet of spring-loaded rat traps, while rubbing hot sauce all over your body. Yeah, he’s sick like that!) He is surrounded by glass bubbles of evil as if he is just now breaking into our plain of existence. Beware the Unicorn Rat. And whatever you do, DO NOT feed it.

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