Hey Octopus! Your ass is grass and I’m the lawn mower. Wait, is that how the saying goes. More like, your ass is glass and I’m the Glassblower. Haha. Burn! Wait, that really sounds wrong. Anyway, these Glass Octopus Pendants are awesome. What’s Kraken? Hopefully not these guys! They can’t take a hit, cuz I heard they have a glass jaw. I wonder where they’re from. Glass-gow? Enough dumb-(gl)ass Octopus jokes. These glass octopus pendants from EmergentGlassworks are going to look great on you. Especially if you are wearing an ocean themed shirt. You ladies are gonna rock-to-pus this octopus.
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Tag: accessory
Frankenstein Book Wallet
Is it a book or a wallet? It’s both. A Frankenstein Book Wallet. Book ’em Franky! Now you can keep all of your important stuff in this wallet that looks like a book. That way no one will steal your stuff, cuz people don’t read anymore. In fact, I don’t even know what this book is about. I just call books paper movies that I will never see. No, I’m not Ill-literate. That means a sick person who reads. How dare you excuse me of fancy book learning.
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This Alien Necktie Is Out Of This World
This Alien Necktie has just left Saturn and is headed toward your anus. I mean Uranus. So… Just make sure you hide your hide. Like my dreams, this tie is full of little green men and stars. Your boss will hate it because it isn’t boring and stupid. Which is exactly why you will love it. That’s okay, cuz your boss is stupid. You know why? Cuz he doesn’t have this tie. Basically he sucks. Don’t be like him.
Stone Skull Cross Pendants
These Stone Skull Cross Pendants from wayanbrothers are badass. What up Damon! What up Marlon! It’s a crucifix skeleton. A Skele-fix. A Crucible of cruci-bones. A cross of calcium. It’s stone cold awesome. Let’s make a petition so that priests have to wear these. I just need your signature right here. Boom! You been scammed bro! You just signed up for a pyramid scheme and I’m at the top, watching all you slaves build the pyramid. Faster! Faster slaves! Oh dang! There’s a guy above me and he just got all the profits. No wonder the Egyptians gave up on pyramids.
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Skeleton Hands Napkin Holder
Everybody put your skeleton hands together for this Skeleton Hands Napkin Holder. It uses both hands to hold your napkins and looks like it is doing so while raising out of a tar pit. When it has no napkins to hold, it just looks like it’s getting ready to clap. Stop giving yourself a hand and give me a napkin already Skeletor! Thanks! High five! No, stop clapping. No more! Stop! Why do you keep giving me the clap?
That came out wrong. I don’t have the clap. You… Stop having the clap. That someone gave you. Shut your stupid claptrap!