Tag: art

Plush Spider Baby: Made From The Souls Of Your Old Toys

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plush spider babyDo you have a bunch of old toys that you would like to re-animate? Cool. Etsy sappymoosetree will work some strange cultist magic and turn your old toys into a kick-ass plush spider baby. Not sure if that involves zapping it with lightning or not, but once this thing comes to life, all of the toys in your house are dead.

And since it will have the souls of all of your old toys and the ones it just ate, it will be an unstoppable force of evil. It may even mutate again all on it’s own. If this thing wanders into a Toys R Us we are all screwed!
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Planet Of The Apes / Frankenstein Sculptures

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planet of the apes head
A planet where 3D Apes evolved from 2d pictures of monsters? In a picture frame? It’s alive! Alive! These apes have evolved from Frankenstein, creating FRANKENZAIUS and APENSTEIN. Clever play on words. You know what else is a clever play on words? FRANKEN-FECES. That’s what they will be flinging when they are forced to war with humans for our resources.

Does no one learn from Mary Shelly? Stop creating these things. Seriously. You’ll kill us all. Except for me. Ape shall not kill ape. Thank God for all this back hair! Wooo-hooo!

Bonus video below.
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Cheese Curl Art Prints

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cheese curl art print
Sure, these Cheese Curl Art Prints are pretty awesome. They have all kinds of cheesy art. There’s a Sasquatch, a cocker spaniel with it’s neck all tilted, the evolution of man in cheese curl form and much more.

About the only thing missing is an art print titled “Fat dude with cheesy puffs all over his shirt, licking his fingers and trying to type”. *Blinding flash* Spoke too soon! That will be a huge seller. Yells, “You gotta pay me royalties!” Damn paparazzi.
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Crazy Ronald McDonald Up-cycled Vinyl Record & Clock

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ronald mcdonald record clock
WTF? Did I just stumble into the McDonalds-land delivery room? Yes. Yes I did. This is a Ronald McDonald Vinyl Record & Clock. The scene being depicted is of the Clown Prince of GMO delivering what is apparently his own baby, who is already wearing a weird little rope diaper. Also a portal to hell has opened in the upper right, letting in a bunch of eyeball bats.

Raise him right Ronald. Learn from your mistakes with Grimace and the Hamburglar. Mayor McCheese was the only kid that really made something of himself. A Cheeseburger.

Pet Paint Will Turn You Into A Real Pug-Casso

Artemis Winterford1 Comment

dog spray paint
Awwww sweet! Pet paint lets you go all graffiti artist on your dog or cat. I’m gonna wear a striped shirt and a beret while painting a renaissance revival fresco on my rottweiler. I have no idea what those words mean. I just heard them on the TV and know I should say them when talking about art. Also, don’t have a rottweiler, but that would be awesome.

Now that I know about this I am gonna paint my cat’s fur so it looks like she’s a gerbil. Then I’m gonna find Richard Gere and scare the bejesus out of him.
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