*Snores loudly as lips reverberate.* Daddy. Daddy. Wake up. Huh? What? What the shizz! Get away from me you foul floating demon. No Daddy. It is I, the culmination of a million lonely nights. You made me. Every time you do the deed with yourself, a little bit of me formed in the ether. Last night, your ritual before bed brought me fully into this world.
Arrrrggghhhhhhh! *Runs screaming out of the house.*
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What in the f**kitty s**tstorm! What on Earth is that Gargoyle doing to you? Oh wait. Just saw the last two images. What are YOU doing to him? I don’t even- It goes from a surprise dry-hump(LOL Look at the terror on that guy’s face. He’s got his hand out like, “Oh nos! WTF is happening?) to an insane struggle that has both of these freaks on the ground rolling around. I’m unsure if this is consensual or not which makes me feel weird.
On the off chance that this ended up being consensual, I wish you both the best of luck. If not. I hope that weird dude feels better soon.
Read more “Inflatable Gargoyle Halloween Costume”
This Skullapillar mini puppet just wants a hug. And since your body is too big, just give the little guy your finger. Let him squeeze it real tight. Paint a little Skullapiller face on your finger and he might even fall in love. Start smooching your finger as he holds it tight, doing a little slow dance.
Until he BITES YOUR FAKE FINGER FACE OFF because that’s how they mate. What are you crazy? You don’t go sticking your finger anywhere near a Skullapillar! What’s wrong with you? Look at him snacking on your fingertip, with that sex afterglow on his mandible face.
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Sarah Squid Seems Sad. Maybe she’s mad, I can’t tell. I’ll say this. She’s well dressed for her period. No, I just mean she’s dressed in period clothing. Not saying it’s that time of the month. Although, judging from that grumpy look… Am I right guys?
*Gets slapped by a suckered tentacle and knocked to the ground.* No, I’m just saying that style is period appropriate, you know- *Smack. Gets face full of squid ink.* Hey that ink is red. You really are- *Smack!* Staying down this time ma’am.
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Octo-Fetus doesn’t need us. It just wants the human race out of it’s fetus face.
Here is the sonogram of your new baby. Would you like to know the baby’s sex?
*Stares with mouth hanging open. Shuts mouth with hand. Turns to wife.*
You told me you and Cthulhu were just friends. That explains the day I came home early to find his tentacles all over you. He’s a licensed masseuse you said. Didn’t put one tentacle where it didn’t belong you said. Well, he put something somewhere.
Read more “Crazy Baby Octo-Fetus”