Tag: decor

Beer Keg Urinal

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beer keg urinal
This awesome Beer Keg Urinal lets you put the beer back where it came from in the first place. Buy beer keg, drink beer, pee beer back into keg. The beautiful circle of life. I mean beer. It makes a great gift. You can’t miss with a beer keg urinal. Well, actually you can. Helps to have a target. Like a crushed can urinal cake.

When I first saw this I thought it was an image of how kegs started out in life. I thought, Jesus, that explains why these things are so damn heavy. But no. Somebody just make a urinal out of a keg.

Ghostbusters Gourd Sculptures

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ghostbusters gourd art
If you don’t like these Ghostbuster’s Gourd Sculptures from Etsy seller Wigoutgraphics, you must be out of your gourd! I’ve been slimed. (Funny Behind the scenes fact: I accidentally wrote, “I’ve been slimmed”, but nope, still have my gut and the doughy body of a nerd God)

The Slimer gourd shows Slimer on the front and in back you can see his brain and ghostly arteries and stuff. If he had such things. The Ungrateful Yuppie Larvae(Not actually me, despite my dad referring to me as such. That’s what the piece is called.) are doing their larvae thing like it’s a womb. Get a womb you two!

If there’s something strange in the neighborhood. Who ya gonna call. Gourd Busters!
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Radioactive Waste Drinking Glasses

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radioactive waste drinking
If you don’t like the idea of drinking out of a human mouth, try these Radioactive Waste Drinking Glasses. I’ll have a Three-Mile Island! No, make that a Manhattan Project. Just give me a Chernobyl on the rocks.

I make my own radioactive glasses. It’s called not washing it for several years and then putting it in an industrial strength microwave for like an hour so that thick layer of bacteria glows. It’s a glass and a night light. The nose bleeds should stop eventually and now that the last tooth is gone, I’m spending my dentist money on cool stuff like video games, so I feel like it’s all good.

Now if I could just stop Hulking out when I’m angry, life would be sweet.

Hand-Crafted Coffin Display Case / Book Shelf

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coffin display case
Who says that the art of reading is dead? No really. Who said that? I can’t remember. Well, reading isn’t dead, but that doesn’t mean you can’t treat your books like a corpse and store them in a coffin. This Coffin Display Case / Book Shelf is the perfect place for all of your scary book and terrifying tomes.

It’s a tomb for your tomes. I made a funny! Also made a funny earlier after eating 3 cheeseburgers and 2 orders of fries. Though it wasn’t funny for the pimply-face Burger king employee named Earl who entered with a respirator and a mop bucket soon after I left. The women in my life all be like, “Did you have a salad?” Yes, I did. A “side salad”, which I left on the side as per the name. Any other questions?

Sugar Skulls Are Hauntingly Sweet

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sugar skull cubes
Sugar skulls. One lump or two? Huh? One lump or two? Look, I don’t care how many bumps it has on it’s head, just drop it in my coffee so I can get mah buzz on like a caffeinated bee. Caffeinated bees are like spelling bees, only much much louder.

Spell “profane”. *Bloodshot eyes wide as hell and twitchy.* PROFANE, P-R-O-F-A-N-E PROFANE. *Forehead veins bulging.* I WILL USE IT IN A SENTENCE. “IF I DON’T WIN THIS F***ING BEE, I’M GETTIN’ ALL PROFANE UP IN DIS BIATCH!” WHERE’S MY COFFEE?
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