Alien Skull Ring – With This Ring I Thee Probe

Alien Skull Ring - With This Ring I Thee ProbeAnybody else ever wake up the next morning after an abduction and find this Alien Skull Ring on your finger? And you’re not sure who your husband is, but judging by the burning in uranus, you know you had a hell of a honeymoon. Yeah, me either, I was just askin’.

I, the perverse alien dirtbag with a thing for hindquarter exploration, take you, puny human, to be my lawfully wedded wife, to have and to probe, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.

He asked me! He asked me! #blessed #sorebumforweeks #cantbeabindingcontract

Sugar Skull Comforter Set or Duvet Cover

Sugar Skull Comforter Set or Duvet Cover
Turn the Day of the Dead into the Day of the Bed. And just don’t get out for anyone or anything. Leave me alone, I’m tired! This Sugar Skull Comforter Set or Duvet Cover is from FolkandFunky, which sounds like a lame buddy cop show from the 60s. One likes folk music, the other likes funk. Together they are cleaning up the streets.

Awwww look at those skulls. They’re so in love. I wonder how they do “it”? Take that back. No I don’t. Just got a mental image of bone on bone action. Wasn’t really all that gross, but the sound of bones on bones grinding really hurt my ears. When the skeletons are rockin’, don’t come a knockin’! I hear that she’s a lady in the streets and a freak in the sheets. If you know what I’m saying. More like a creak in the sheets. You know, cuz bones.

Till death do us part? I got news for you two. I think you’re about to divorce cuz you is both dead dead dead! But you look lovely. Really, you two are a cute couple. Couple of corpses!

Seriously, they have all kinds of awesome Gothic, skeleton, too creepy to go to bed sets. Check out the whole shop.

Horror Themed PS4 Controllers

Horror Themed PS4 Controllers
These Horror Themed PS4 Controllers are perfect for playing scary horror games in the dark. You can choose from 2 Jason Voorhees versions and one that has Leatherface, chucky and Jason. These are custom handmade controllers. Button mashers? Nah man, I play button slashers! Man, I wish I was rocking a PS4. I’m still playing Atari. I’m keeping it old school. Like really really old school. Like my school is torn down due to asbestos old school and all the kids need to be tested and all the parents are suing.
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Skull and Crossbones Wire Bun Cover

Skull and Crossbones Wire Bun Cover
Damn. That Skull and Crossbones Wire Bun Cover is awesome. You know what they say, a bun on the head is better than a bun in the oven. That’s what I heard anyway. This is gonna make some librarian look totally badass. It’s Mary Poppins meets Mad Max. Where did they meet? I have no idea, but I hear they sat down for tea and talked shop for a few hours. Then they made sweet love and the credits gently rolled.

Anatomy Pint Glasses

Anatomy Pint Glasses
These Anatomy Pint Glasses make it easy for the beer to hit your skull, brain, heart, and ribs real quick. *Slams fist down* Bartender, give me a beer right in my brain! *BAM!* Hitting me in the head with the bottle is not what I meant. I meant, put it in my brain glass. Let’s try this again. I’ll take a white russian in my ribs. *Bartender whistles and a burly Ruskie comes out from the backroom. Punches me in the ribs* Seriously, you just keep that guy back there for times like this? Fine, fine. I’ll take whatever you want in one of your glasses. Oh that’s cute. You gave me the glass with the spider in it that you trapped five minutes ago. Great. Damn, I hurt! Is there a hospital around here?