This Black Fleece Coffin Pillow is the best way to rest in peace. Just rest your head on this baby and take a nice nap. Don’t worry about bed head. You should be more concerned with dead head. Too bad it doesn’t come with some bedding, cuz I love dead in a bag stuff. I mean bed in a bag. More like bed in a bodybag. Am I right? High five. No? It’s dead in here.
Tag: fleece
Scarecrow Face Warmer Mask
I’m gonna get a Scarecrow Face Warmer Mask and sing in the forest.
I could while away the hours
Conferrin’ with the flowers,
Consulting with the rain;
And my head I’d be a scratchin’
While my thoughts are busy hatchin’
If I only had a brain.
Then a girl from Kansas would spot me. I would turn around and she would scream and run away terrified. Which is cool cuz I’m not from Kansas and I’m not interested in a long distance relationship right now.
Cthulhu Onesie Is Cthulhu Funsie
This Cthulhu Onesie is Cthulhu funsie. An ancient evil has awakened and you get to crawl inside. Cthulhu will keep you warm and toasty, but you will never be sane again. So I guess this onesie is perfect for me, since I’m already not sane. I’m not insane, cuz doesn’t that imply that I’m “In” sane, as in, in the sane? The English language. Now that’s insane. Insane in the membrane!
This fun onesie- I’m calling it a funsie or if a 500 dude gets in it, a ton-sie. This Cthulhu shell for nerd adults will insure that your friends leave you one by one, so that you are always wearing this around the house alone. Just the way it is.
Octo-Hat With Tentacles
Need a cool hat that has style? Don’t get your panties in a bunch, but do get your tentacles in a bunch with the Octo-Hat. It will give you gorgeous long tentacle locks that you will want to curl and tease. The tentacles double a scarf. I wonder if the tentacles have suckers, cuz I don’t want no octo-hickeys on my neck. Am I the only one who finds the eyes on this thing super grumpy?
Don’t be an Octo-puss. Get an Octo-Hat.
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Fleece Sloth Animal Hat
This Brown Fleece Sloth Animal Hat will keep you warm, but it will take all damn day to do it. Do you have any idea how slow Sloths are? They’re full of slow slothhy sloth-ness, which is a medical condition. You would have to tell this hat, “Hey, I’m going out next week and it’s going to be cold. I’m gonna put you on my head now. So get your s*it together and start placing your arms in ear-warming and scarf positions now.”
It might be ready by next week if you’re lucky. What the hell is the Sloth’s problem? It’s so damn chill and slow. The stoner of the animal kingdom. Are there no predators you are worried about? Speed it up man! Even I got predators. What’s that? Oh right. Those are creditors. Always get them confused.
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