Tag: monster

Awesome Tattoo Art Prints

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Awesome Tattoo Art Prints
Sweet! Look at all the cool ink I just got. Syke! For my wall, not my body. I would never get a tattoo. My body is a temple. One that worships, twinkies, ding-dongs and ho-hos. Actually, I tried to get a tattoo once, but I kept passing out just looking at the selection book. The guy was all like, “Do you have narcolepsy?” And I was all like, “No, I’m cool dude. I ain’t gonna rat you out.”

These Awesome Tattoo Art Prints from ParlorTattooPrints won’t hurt a bit. Tattoo your home with all of these creepy/cool monsters and horror movie icons. Now I can be cool and say I have a bunch of tattoos. *BAM* Sorry, I just passed out thinking about it.
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Zombie Cubes: Zombies Squared!

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zombie cubes
Stack up some Zombie Cubes and build a cool Zombie fort. Fun fact of the day and behind the scenes tidbit: I almost typed Zombie Pubes. Was gonna leave it, but then I figured zombie pubes are probably the first thing to fall out once you get bitten by an undead psychopath. If they don’t need ’em on their privates, I don’t need ’em in my paragraph.

These little cubes are hand painted and each zombie has its’ own personality. Squished it, toss it, stack them up and knock them down. Just like a real zombie, no matter how much abuse you throw at these, they will retain their original shape, even if crushed. Stack’em, whack’em, thwack ’em, straight up attack ’em. Pubeless monsters!

Cool Monster Eye Pocket Watch Case Pendants

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Cool Monster Eye Pocket Watch Case Pendants
Hey peeps. Do you like monster eyes? Like dragons and Krakens and stuff? TheArkanaWorkshop makes these awesome Monster Eye Pocket Watch Case Pendants. May the eye of the dragon be upon you. I’m not even sure what that means. An old man said that to me in a dream. I think it means it is my destiny to get one of these and wear it. Cool. The secret life that I have in my head rocks! Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, these eyes in pocket watch cases are friggin awesome. These eyes look scary and creepy and totally badass. When I look at it up close, does the dragon see a human eye pendant looking back? Like it’s a portal to another world? If so, I’m gonna moon it.

*Drops pants. Shakes butt in front of dragon pendant.* How do you like that dragon? There’s a full moon out tonight in Hobbit land! Ha ha. Hope I don’t set off any werewolves on that side! *Fire erupts from the pendant as I run away trailing smoke from my burnt butt.*
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Concrete Cyclops Skull

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Concrete Cyclops Skull
Okay Cyclops Skull, keep an eye on the garden for me. Get it? If you do just say aye! I kid, I kid. I just like talking to my garden decorations. Say, I need to plug in the weed whacker. Do you have a spare socket? Zing! Burn! I got you so good. We are having so much pun. Wanna hear some music? I’ll get my eye-pad. Where is it? Hmmm. Keep an eye out for me will ya? Man, I crack myself up. *Drops skull in garden* Laterz. Eye have to go eat!

Next day…

*Walks out to the garden whistling. Trips over cyclops skull and gets impaled by a rake. Dying…* Eye…Eye…Eye sorry. Ha ha ha erg gasp choke gurgle dead.

KaijuMon Pokemon Kaiju Art Prints

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KaijuMon Pokemon Kaiju Art Prints
Pokemon + Kaiju = KaijuMon! That is an awesome monster hybrid right there. Check out these cool art prints from MikeGoesGeek featuring different KaijuMon. These Pokemon catch all of us! There’s Venusaur and Onix, Charizard and Chrmander, Blastoise and Aerodactyl and more. These monsters are here to chew bubblegum and kick ass and they are all out of bubblegum. PLEASE SOMEONE GIVE THEM SOME GUM! Nevermind, there goes the candy store under Blastoise’s foot. Now he’s pissed he has gooey nasty candy stuck to his foot along with the head of the store clerk.

Oh well, it’s all over now. I TOLD YOU KIDS TO STOP HUNTING POKEMON. ARE YOU HAPPY NOW? HOW FUN IS IT NOW? I’m off to loot toilet paper and cigs so I have some currency in this new world. What’s left of it.
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