Hand Embroidery Of Saint Cthulhu

Hand Embroidery Of Saint Cthulhu
Worship at the altar of Saint Cthulhu with this Hand Embroidery Of Saint Cthulhu. It’s sacri-licious. Speaking of sainthood, what’s a guy gotta do to get sainted around here. This morning I helped an old lady across the street, later I even gave some down and out woman some money. I mean, sure, the old lady was running away from the nursing home(at a half mile per hour) and that nice lady I gave the money to was a prostitute, but still, I’m pretty sure I made both of their days.

I guess I’m gonna be a sinner and not a saint. The church never returns my letters anyway and that online petition for my sainthood only has 10 signatures and those are from my crazy cat lady neighbor and her nine cats. Not givin’ up though. I’m gonna keep rock n’ rollin’ if you keep on rock n’ rollin’. I know I can do this. We can do it together.

T-Rex Toilet Paper Holder

T-Rex Toilet Paper Holder
When I’m taking a Jurassic dump, I like to reach into the jaws of a mighty T-Rex to get my toilet paper. This awesome 3D printed T-Rex Toilet Paper Holder will make you roar! Of course that could just be the mighty roar of you battling your Stega-Sore-ass to get your stuff out. Seriously, fiber! I can’t stress that enough. Anywho, this TP holder will hook you up even if it’s coming out like a raging diarhea volcano. Which coincidentally is what killed the dinosaurs in the first place. True story. Mass (colon) extinction event! Look it up.
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Beetlejuice – American Gothic

Beetlejuice - American Gothic
It’s Beetlejuice and Lydia Deetz as the American Gothic couple. This is a super cool art print. Unless I’m wrong and it’s the poster for a new Beetlejuice show. Look at Beet(Not gonna type his name 3 times here) hamming it up for the camera like a big old ham. You better stick that fork in yourself ya big old ham. Oh that’s right. Hey hey hey, it’s for hay. You gonna bail on my dude? That’s just a little hay humor. Anyway, shouldn’t you two get back to farming? Or something?

The Grim Reaper Illuminated Wall Sculpture

The Grim Reaper Illuminated Wall Sculpture
Seasons don’t fear the reaper. Nor do the wind, the sun or the rain… I fear that guy, cuz I’m not wind, sun or rain. Although I do break my share of wind both in the sun and in the rain so that others may fear the reaper. This awesome Grim Reaper Illuminated Wall Sculpture reminded me. It makes it look like the old Grimster is coming out of your wall, bearing a light like he just captured your soul.

Damn dude, why ya gotta bug me while I’m sitting at home surfing the internet? And what’s up with those ribs? You can decide who lives and who dies, but you can’t get a shirt that fits right? Actually, I hear ya on that one. My gut makes it a challenge. No, don’t cry! *Sigh* Fine, you hang right there and we can talk all about it. It’s gonna be okay. Now tell me all about it. There there. Don’t be so Grim! Maybe you should write your feelings down in a book. Maybe a grimnoir? I kid. I kid. You look like death warmed over.

Mr And Mrs Frankenstein Knife Set

Mr And Mrs Frankenstein Knife Set
This Mr And Mrs Frankenstein Knife Set is purely for decorative purposes, but it should read “In case of marital monster fight break glass”. That way Mr. and Mrs. monster can fight to the death. It probably turns them on. Monsters are weird like that.

You get two twin butcher knives that are hand painted with the likeness of Frankenstein and his bride, in a shadow box.
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