Tag: etsy

Jar Jar Binks Is The Ultimate Warrior, With Sword and Cyber Shield

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

jar jar binks warriorJar Jar Binks is the bane of the Star Wars prequels, but now he is back and ready for action! He came to chew bubble gum and kick ass. And he is all out of bubble gum!

This Gungan doesn’t need a gun-gun. He has his sword and shield and even a power crystal! Get ready for the ultimate sequel/prequel/squee-quel: JAR WARS! Directed by a 5 year old with a hot-glue gun and a dream.

It’s enough to make Jabba The Hutt puke!
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Ghoulies 3D Art Poster: They’ll Get You In The End.

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

ghoulies art posterAh, the 80s. So many bad movies. So many bad things that can happen to you on the toilet. Now you can relive the fun with this Ghoulies 3D art poster. Because nothing says classy art more than a toilet creeper ready to get all up in your business when you go to take a dukey. Just $25 from Etsy seller Popsicart.

Click through for another shot and a bonus video.
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Duck Pirate Ship: Shiver Me Timbers (And Tailfeathers)

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

duck pirate shipAhoy Matey. This be the scurge o the seven seas. When this here vessel hits ye with broadsides and makes to board ye, the crew be not intent on playing duck duck goose…What the duck?

This ducked up pirate ship is $2,500.00 worth of whacked out awesomeness from Etsy seller spiderjelly. It is made of fiberglass, doll parts, chains, a barbie doll, wood, aluminum, wire and more. Look at those broadsides and the cool duck woman figurehead.

Click through for more cool images.
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Nightmare from the Underbed Rabbit Monster

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

rabbit monsterI’m feeling a tad sick. Maybe I’ll just get some soup from the cupboard. That will feel nice and-*opens the cupboard and screams. Slams the cupboard shut, screaming some more, running around hysterically in circles, hyperventilating into a paper bag, before fainting*

No. No, I’m feeling healthy. I’ll be fine. No soup for me. In fact, I don’t need anything from that cupboard. Ever again.

This scary beast clutching a soup can comes from Etsy seller RavendarkCreations for $250. It was inspired by Brom’s illustrated novel Plucker.
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Toilet Paper Necklace

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

toilet paper necklaceThis Toilet Paper Necklace from Etsy is pretty cool. Even though it looks like it would only give a really tiny person like 3 wipes. 1 if you’ve been hitting the Taco Bell a lot.

I would wear it to remind me to buy TP. I’m always forgetting. Just ask my once proud Scientific American magazine collection about that! I’m getting really tired of wiping my ass with inventor’s diagrams and pictures of the latest stealth aircraft. Yeah, my trash teaches dumpster divers to get a f***ing job and stop being a cheap-ass.
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