Tag: freaky

Clear Half Fetus For Your Wall

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Clear Half Fetus For Your Wall
This Clear Half Fetus needs a womb with a view. You decorate with this thing and it will look like you got angry and just chucked a womb-y slimey fetus against the wall like it was a basketball and now it’s just embedded there. Nothing but net- *Splat* Oh nevermind. I like how it has that “in the womb” look. Icky and sticky. Somebody slap that things ass and hose it off. It’s a great conversation piece. If you have the womb for it.

I feel like it should have an umbilical cord hanging down that doubles as a phone though.

Body Parts Coffee Mugs

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Body Parts Coffee Mugs
What the deuce? Would someone please ex-spleen what it is I’m seeing? Oh. These are Body Parts Coffee Mugs? Cool. That explains why that one is shaped like a kidney. You get PANCREAS, HDL, KIDNEY, STOMACH, TRIGLYCERIDES and MUSCLE. I have no idea what the hell HDL is. Human dingus liposites? Have no idea, but that sounds painful.

What’s next? A limited edition rectum stein? If so, I’ll have to keep my eyes peeled. FYI: Rectum Stein was Dr. Frankenstein’s prototype monster. I can see why he tried again. The name alone is not encouraging. Oh wait. I’m wrong. Rectum Stein was Dr. Frankenstein’s brother. Yeah, he was into a bunch of strange stuff. You don’t want to know about that guy’s monsters.
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Rocking Taxidermy Goat

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Rocking Taxidermy Goat
If the goat is rockin’ don’t come a knockin’. This Rocking Taxidermy Goat is definitely rocking. He’s pretty horny too, meaning that he has great big horns. Not meaning the other thing. What did you think I was implying? *Sigh.* That really get’s my goat. Get’s my goat and gets it rocking. The seller named it Mason. Obviously they never set it free, because that would have made him a Freemason. Can’t have that. Also, you can’t free something that is dead, so there’s that. The seller says:

Mason the rocking goat has a 300 lb threshold. Even your drunk uncle Louie can go for a whirl.

First, how did you know I had a drunk Uncle Louie and second, no he can’t, cuz he is tipping the scales at 400.

Freaky Renaissance Style Alien Art

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Freaky Renaissance Style Alien Art
This Renaissance Style Alien Art reminds us that aliens have been invading our shizz since way back and they haven’t stopped yet. They just dress different these days. Which is weird cuz those renaissance clothes kick butt. It’s also weird cuz aren’t they usually naked these days? They’re all like, “I’m up for whatever, it’s cool.” The artist also sells some classic album covers with aliens added to them. Pretty cool stuff.
Freaky Renaissance Style Alien Art

Freaky Renaissance Style Alien Art

Zombie in a Bottle

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Zombie in a Bottle
Zombie in a Bottle. Sounds like an awesome drink. I’ll buy a whole case. Actually, this is a real zombie figure in a bottle. Carry your zombie friend in your pocket, use him as a necklace, or just set him on your desk and admire his trapped and tormented zombie soul. I’m thinking I can pop the top, give it a rub and make a wish. I would wish for food. Then when nothing happens, I would go to bed, only to wake up later as this zombie is feasting on my flesh like the small flesh-eater it is.

What’s up with that?

You wished for food. nom nom nom.

Yeah, so?

Well, the food is you. nom nom nom.

Back in your glass prison you psycho little-
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