Sugar Skull Comforter Set or Duvet Cover

Sugar Skull Comforter Set or Duvet Cover
Turn the Day of the Dead into the Day of the Bed. And just don’t get out for anyone or anything. Leave me alone, I’m tired! This Sugar Skull Comforter Set or Duvet Cover is from FolkandFunky, which sounds like a lame buddy cop show from the 60s. One likes folk music, the other likes funk. Together they are cleaning up the streets.

Awwww look at those skulls. They’re so in love. I wonder how they do “it”? Take that back. No I don’t. Just got a mental image of bone on bone action. Wasn’t really all that gross, but the sound of bones on bones grinding really hurt my ears. When the skeletons are rockin’, don’t come a knockin’! I hear that she’s a lady in the streets and a freak in the sheets. If you know what I’m saying. More like a creak in the sheets. You know, cuz bones.

Till death do us part? I got news for you two. I think you’re about to divorce cuz you is both dead dead dead! But you look lovely. Really, you two are a cute couple. Couple of corpses!

Seriously, they have all kinds of awesome Gothic, skeleton, too creepy to go to bed sets. Check out the whole shop.

Anatomy Pint Glasses

Anatomy Pint Glasses
These Anatomy Pint Glasses make it easy for the beer to hit your skull, brain, heart, and ribs real quick. *Slams fist down* Bartender, give me a beer right in my brain! *BAM!* Hitting me in the head with the bottle is not what I meant. I meant, put it in my brain glass. Let’s try this again. I’ll take a white russian in my ribs. *Bartender whistles and a burly Ruskie comes out from the backroom. Punches me in the ribs* Seriously, you just keep that guy back there for times like this? Fine, fine. I’ll take whatever you want in one of your glasses. Oh that’s cute. You gave me the glass with the spider in it that you trapped five minutes ago. Great. Damn, I hurt! Is there a hospital around here?

Skull Couch Feet

Skull Couch Feet
These Skull Couch Feet are like creepy sneakers for your couch. Cuz your couch’s feet get cold people. Give it some scary Nikes. People be like, Damn! Your couch come wit that?” And you’ll be all like, “Sweet ain’t it?” Your couch be all like, “I look good son! Now get me some badass armrests and a tattoo before I swallow one of you fat-asses whole!”
Read more “Skull Couch Feet”

Losing My Religion… and My Lunch – Infected Crucifix

Losing My Religion... and My Lunch - Infected Crucifix
If you have an Infected Crucifix like this in your church, you really have a health hazard. Would it kill ya to at least spray some Windex on everything, oh I don’t know, once a century? Cuz I know the bacteria and germs on this thing WILL kill ya. This will be the first time ever that a priest has to be called in to perform an exorcism on the cross itself. Actually, I’m pretty sure this is the cross that creates all demons and bad things in this world, while also smelling putrid, like the puss smell of a thousand zitty butts, when all the zits burst at the same time. Lunch? You lost it.

This piece really grosses me out. Why have you shown me this lord? Why have you cast my eyes upon this? What is the message?

*Booming voice* Because you have an infection you idiot!

Oh….

Is it my weiner? Please don’t let it be my weiner.

Waaaa waaaa waaaa. This is the thanks I get for trying to warn you? Nothing but complaining! NOW it is your weiner!

Oh boy! Starting to feel the burn. Is it too late for some hail marys and a confession?

Universal Monsters Prayer Candle Set

Universal Monsters Prayer Candle Set
Really enjoying my Universal Monsters Prayer Candle Set. Every night I light these bad boys and pray. Dear God, please don’t let Frankenstein’s monster find my house. Or his wife. Please don’t let the mummy invade my dreams and suffocate me by wrapping me in his bandages while he turns into my doppelganger and lives my life. Just keep me safe k? Thanks.