Tag: jewelry

Werewolf Eye Pendant

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Werewolf Eye Pendant
This Werewolf Eye Pendant is giving me the stink eye. At least, that’s what I assume, since werewolves all stink. It’s like they captured the eyeball just as the dude was turning into a Werewolf and now you can wear it. I hope you’re happy. Meanwhile, some poor Werewolf is going by the name of “One-Eye” and his depth perception is junk now. Can’t even catch a squirrel. Can’t even sleep with one eye open to watch out for other threats. You have basically signed this guy’s death warrant. Was it worth it? Well?

Yeah, I agree, it’s totally worth it. That’s a rad pendant. He’s still got an eye. No harm done. Not like he could see well enough to hurt you anyway, if he found out.

Nightmare On Elm Street Freddy Krueger Pendant Necklace

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Nightmare On Elm Street Freddy Krueger Pendant Necklace
All you people who say that Freddy has no heart, you’re wrong. It’s right here. Even looks like his sweater and has his hat hung right on the corner. Also has slash marks because apparently Freddy tried to give himself open heart surgery at some point. This Nightmare On Elm Street Freddy Krueger Pendant Necklace is a fashionable tribute to a fashionable guy. Hey, it takes guts to rock that sweater and hat.

Now you can wear Freddy’s cold dead heart and he may even spare you if it sees it around your neck in a dream. Yeah, I doubt it too, but you never know.

Vampire Repellent Necklace

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Vampire Repellent Necklace
Vampires hate garlic. That’s why I eat garlic bread every night of the week. Saved my life many times. Like that night I saw a shadowy figure and I hissed like a wild cat, spreading my garlic venom through the air toward him. Naturally, he retreated at the same time I continued on my way. That time it was just a reflection of myself in the store window, but still. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of bites to the neck. This Vampire Repellent Necklace will help too.

Vampires hate garlic and they hate garlic clove pendants. They won’t mess with garlic in any form. That’s why you never see any Italian Vampire chefs.

Pro tip: Always watch who’s buying the garlic products at the grocery store. That’ll tell ya who isn’t a bloodsucker. Anyone that does not buy garlic definitely needs to be followed home and staked. By a professional of course. Don’t try that at home.

Kraken Octopus Ring

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Kraken Octopus Ring
Unleash the Kraken! Well, you didn’t have to give me the finger while wearing a Kraken Octopus Ring. That’s not a very nice way to unleash the Kraken. Then again, now that I think about it, there’s probably no polite way to unleash the Kraken. And I really have to stop barging into rooms and shouting that.

You would think I would have learned my lesson after rushing through my bathroom door and shouting it. The plumber was still crouched over the toilet, and he had already unleashed his hairy Crack-en. *sigh* Some phrases sound cool, but should never be uttered.
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Classic Monster Cuff Bracelets

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Classic Monster Cuff Bracelets
Allison Taylor Designs makes these Classic Monster Cuff Bracelets for monster loving wrists. They make all kinds of cool jewelry, but we really dig these. I saw these and I was all like, “I’m here to turn myself over to the jewelry police. Cuff me. I’m guilty.” Okay, so they are more for the ladies. Your point? I think I’m man enough to pull it off. Putting it on is another matter! Okay, that joke fell flat. It was just off the cuff. Not really myself today if I’m honest. Need more coffee so I can be more cuff-einated.

Okay, that joke was totally on the cuff, so I ain’t gettin’ in a huff. Don’t believe me? Wanna call my bluff? Just an idiot with a blog, sayin’ stuff. And now, that’s enough!
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