Tag: kitten

Leather Cat Purse

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Leather Cat Purse
Wait, wait, wait! Let me see if I have this expression straight. The cat’s out of the bag. But how can it be, when this Leather Cat Purse clearly shows that the cat IS the bag? Is the bag now out of the cat? No, really, this is messing with my head. I can’t tell if this thing is the cat’s meow or the cat’s pajamas. Is it ketchup or catsup? Now I’m freaking out man! Cat have your tongue? No, but it can hold your lipstick and other stuff.

Anyway, look what the cat dragged in. This awesome purse. Ha ha. It looks like the cat that ate the canary. ha ha. I’m losing it. Losing it. Like a cat on a hot tin roof. I need to go meow.

Creepy Kittens With Crystal Skulls

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Creepy Kittens
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Kitties. In theaters meow! Not really. Hello my little creepers. I saw this trio of terror and I thought of you. Have fun sleeping tonight. The seller calls them abdabs, which coincidentally is my pet name for my ab-flab. These guys are almost as scary.

You would think crystal kittens would have crystal mittens, but nope. Just crystal skulls. So they can telepathically murder us no doubt as their skulls light up. FYI my cat just saw this and lost her sh*t!

What’s that girl? They are an ancient race of slavers and that’s why you guys left your home planet of nip-nip-nibbles-meow-meows(Rough translation) and befriended the Egyptians? To escape them? Hmmmm. Say, how much do you figure you are worth to them? Hypothetically?

Kitty Fluffums no! My eyes!
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Large Black Velvet Cat Cleaning Itself Plush Sculpture

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cat cleaning itself plushI should get this weird cat cleaning itself plush sculpture to show my cat how messed up she looks when she is doing kitty yoga and licking herself all over like she’s a friggin’ ice cream cone. It’s just rude. You don’t see me lifting my leg up and licking my flabby nerd body in front of company. No. I wait until I’m alone to do that stuff because I know it’s f***ing weird.

This thing is 16 inches tall and looking pretty creepy with no damn eyes at all. No way I would let this in my house. This cat’s ready to give himself more licks than the Tootsie Pop owl and will probably finish off with a great big bite too.

Click through for more pics, including one where this cat is doing his thing outside for the neighbors to see. No damn shame!
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What The Meow?: Cat Grooming Restraint Bag And Cat Muzzle

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Cat Grooming Restraint Bag And Cat Muzzle Cats are cute and adorable creatures, but when it comes time for grooming these sweet little fur children can get all feral and rip your face off. That’s why you have to go all Hannibal Lecter and restrain them like they are in a Kitty Asylum for the criminally insane. This Cat Grooming Restraint Bag And Cat Muzzle will help.

Wheel your cat out in this restraint system and even though you’ll have to listen to them say stuff like “Hello Clarice.” and “My last owner tried to groom me. I ate his liver with some Fancy Feast and a nice bottle of chianti.”, you’ll be able to groom him or her easily.
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Cat Drinking Fountain

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cat drinking fountainGive your cat friends a neat fountain to drink from and stop making them drink from a dish. They just want to be like you and do things that humans do. This $1,250. cat fountain is all fluffy requires for his or her drinking needs.

All my cat would do with this is just bat her hands against the water a few times and then sit and look at me.

*I made you waste your money again human.*

It’s not a waste you little-. I bought it for me. Watch me drink from it. See?

*I made you drink from a cat fountain human. Your lives belong to me*

First off, I only have one life, not nine. Second-

*One puny lives for me to dominatez?*

What are you-?

*Hisssss! Enough acting brave for yourz blog. Into the room of living. I grow weary and haz need of yourz lap for nap timez.*

Looks like I have a new human fountain. Gotta go.
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