See that little stool on the chair? That’s a poop you can take to the office. Not a poop you take at the office. It is a “Poop Office” plush doll. The size is healthy, but I don’t know about that color and shape.
This is Poopert, from the comic series Poop Office. I didn’t even know that existed. Probably because I spend more time making these things than reading about them. Then it all comes full circle as I write about them. Write what ya know.
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Want to look like animated characters are strangling you while you relax your neck and rest your head? These Adventure Time neck pillows will do the trick. It comes in Finn and Jake versions. Etsy seller ComfortbyFeliciaRose has all kinds of cool neck pillows for your travel enjoyment.
I would just wear them out on the town like how those snooty old ladies wear their fur. I am so gonna be rocking this style. They also protect your neck from Vampires like Marceline, so it’s all good. I would let her bite me, but I’m saving myself for Lumpy Space Princess.
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When you order this awesome Pizza Dragon, he flies to your house in a half hour or less, or he’s free. Free to set your face on fire, while he drips flaming grease and pepperoni from his wings like the vengeful winged stuffed-scale crust pizza demon that he is.
That gives me an awesome idea for a pizza chain. I’m gonna raise baby pizza dragons. I’ll raise some pepperoni, some with other toppings. They don’t even need to go into the oven since they practically cook themselves. Best of all I won’t need drivers. Just pay for your Dragon-Pizza and it gets set free so it can fly to your house. I would get rave reviews too:
“By the time I caught the thing I had third degree burns and melted cheese all over my house and now I’m undergoing throat surgery since it’s saucy blood was like lava.”
“It was OK, but my wife and Khaleesi is the Mother of Dragons. She was pretty pissed when she found out what we were eating.”
“The sausage was all carbon and ash by the time it got here. Then it ate my cat, which sucked, however, it immediately grew new bits of sausage all over it’s cheesy skin between the wings… with bits of fur in it. At least I didn’t have to bury my animal. Thanks Pizza Dragon!”
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Maker of infectious toys modeled after viruses Giantmicrobes has one weird plush that is sure to be passed around a lot this season. Their entire stock is sold out, probably thanks to its small and large Ebola plushes and its Ebola petri dish toy being so hot this season.
I didn’t order one. I’m too busy looking for the next threat that we are supposed to be scared of after this one. They should really give out flu plushes with vaccinations though, since you get it every time they give you a flu shot. Thanks. I’d hate to see what happens when you try to protect me from Ebola. I’ll just grow my own moldy petri dish and see what I can come up with.
I should get this weird cat cleaning itself plush sculpture to show my cat how messed up she looks when she is doing kitty yoga and licking herself all over like she’s a friggin’ ice cream cone. It’s just rude. You don’t see me lifting my leg up and licking my flabby nerd body in front of company. No. I wait until I’m alone to do that stuff because I know it’s f***ing weird.
This thing is 16 inches tall and looking pretty creepy with no damn eyes at all. No way I would let this in my house. This cat’s ready to give himself more licks than the Tootsie Pop owl and will probably finish off with a great big bite too.
Click through for more pics, including one where this cat is doing his thing outside for the neighbors to see. No damn shame!
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