Damn. Bigfoot is in trouble. He’s taking on an Alligator and getting his leg bitten off. Big mistake. Everyone knows that Alligators love Bigfoot meat. Why do you think you can’t find Bigfoot? Because they are in the stomachs of Alligators. That’s why.
It’s the same reason you can’t find Doritos in my town. Cause I already got em. Better luck next time son. Many a man has lost his hand to my snapping jaws as he reached for a bag of Cool Ranch. They had that same look on their face as Bigfoot has here. Nacho day fool!
See what I did there? Doritos make everything awesome and keep bloggers fed for like weeks. Where’s my insulin? Whatevs. Probably in the bottom of this bag. I’ll let you know.
It’s about time that your Superhero worship included collecting poo. It shouldn’t be surprising that you can find Superhero poop 
It’s the titan of Transylvania versus the mighty moon. Fight! 
Seems wrong, but some people really get off on their veggies, to the point of taking them into their bed and- *Hands on face Home Alone style* -sleeping with them. Relax Vegans, Vegetarians and Vulva-sharians, I’m just talkin’ bout snuggling the carrot, not waxing it. This giant carrot body pillow is crazy.
Look at this.